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My name is Andy and Im a compulsive gambler.I have now managed 260 days without a bet,which for me seemed absolutely impossible before.Fortunately ive managed to steer clear of it.Buut life still doesnt seem any easier,in fact its twice as hard as it was 12 months ago,still always broke and just fighting to keep head above water,so nothing has changed there.I have an empty life and nothing really to keep going for and often I wander is it worth it.Gambling has me licked yes,but I feel that so has life.Almost every bit of enthuseasm for life has been sucked out of me and although I do want it back,I just cant seem to see where it will ever return.I hate and detest gambling and hope I never return to it,but I fear that I will be sucked back into it one day,purely because Im so frustrated and bored of living.Andy


Hi Andy, Helen here! Course your life has improved without gambling. Think about the stress, the sleepless nights and the juggling of finances. Things must have gotten better on these things alone. Are you working the twelve steps Andy? have you a sponsor from your GA group? Don't even think that your life will improve if you go back to the dreaded gambling. Come back on here and post a bit more often, especially when you are feeling that things are not improving. Go offer some of your time to an organisation that may be helping other people get their lives back on track. Talk about your feelings in the GA meeting - don't hold back, there will be others who feel the same as you do.
Anyway Andy I still remember the first time you posted on here and what despair you was in, I can tell the improvement in you so just don't even think about gambling again.
You take care because there are people on here who care about you - me for one.
Helen - Australia


Thank you Helen for your continued support and kind words.I havent done any of the things youve suggested nor have I even read the book for ages,no excuses,just a head full of non stop stress every day about staying afloat in life.And probably because I have far too much time on my hands and Im alone 99.9% of the time its no wander that ive gone insane and do too much thinking.
All my friends are settled down,and with someone and I hardly ever see what family I have.I do try and keep busy and very active doing many sports and gym,but its not enough and motivation is far too low.All I know is that today I havent gambled and some 262 days clear from it,I cant see any changes in me and I havent really changed my lifestyle,in fact I merely exist from day to day and I dont really know what makes me get up everyday as there is just nothing in my existance that is really worth getting up for.Andy


dear,andy.the most important thing,is that you are not gambling.i too suffer from all those fellings you are talking about,i recently had a slip and i know' andy the feelings are worse when gambling,i struggle on a daily basis with feelings of self worth,i havnt got a job,no girlfried ,.and very little money.i think its amazing that you have gone so long,b kind on yourself mate thats such a great achievment.keep strong mate,and before you know it life will get better for you,stay safe all the best red <!-- sBig Grin --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_biggrin.gif" alt="Big Grin" title="Very Happy" /><!-- sBig Grin -->


Hi Andy

You have much to be proud of, much to live for, and a future even though right now you cant see that light. I have a girlfriend, she is everything to me, but for 5 long years she cant admit to what she is, an addict, and i suffer the consequences through choice, because im despreate to see her stop ruining her life and ours. You Andy have taken a huge leap forward. It will take time to see the results of your efforts, but the days will come when you can look back and be really proud that you stuck with it. Keep OFF the gambling, make that 262 days 1062 days and onward. You will see the results of your change in life, that day will come - be patient, be focused, and be determined to manage your money and your life for the future....
Well done.


Hi andy

Often we concentrate on ourselves too much. We dwell on the past. That's only natural, the trick is to take our mind off this. Helen's idea of volunteer work is a very good one. Get you off the street for a while, keep you busy, and aslo help with your self esteem issues.
I realise there are people worse off than me. I try to address that by visiting these and other forums and hopefully offer some good advice. By doing this, I am aslo filling in my time,helping other people, and also helping with my own self worth.
We all have trouble with this self esteem issue. The lousy feelings will gradually dissipate. One day at a time.
Keep posting. 262 days is something you should be proud of. Be proud of it.
My biggest problem when gambling was boredom. Find something you enjoy doing. Reading,gardening,volunteer workk,bike ride etc.
I know money is a problem. We all face that monster. Things will get better. You are not alone.

Best wishes


Andy, I know how you feel. I dont have any answers for you as I feel the same. I have done about the same time as you, about 300 days and I gambled tonight as I couldn't stand the loneliness anymore. Good luck to you. If there is any consolation in this is that I feel the same way. Hold on.