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Had enough - Printable Version

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Re: Had enough - cleo - 27-03-2011

hi serena25.i too am new here and know exactly how u feel.i too have a gambling addiction that is ruining my life,i have gambled for years and it has slowly become a real problem.Not just in terms of money but in that its all i think about.i have 2 children and a supportive bloke and all i do is let them down.had an amazing win last week,one that would have got rid of financial worries for a few years but a few days later returned it to online slots with more added to it.i am a mess and need help.havent gambled since-3 days today but cant stop myself still playing for fun and the thought that maybe il win it back is constantly at the back of my mind.have been reading the posts on here and its a help to read that its not just yourself in this situation,it is an illness and one that makes you feel like your losing your mind.it can break you and as others have said it can end one of 3 ways-insanity,with you in prision or dead because you cant cope with the feelings anymore.have you read the 12 step programe?i have been looking through that and all the other litriture and it makes perfect sense,i am a spiritual person and think if you could join the programme you would come out the other side and grow as a person.the serentity prayer gives great encouragement.unfortunatley i live nowhere near a meeting-40 miles away and do not drive so am going to have to try and beat this addiction with the help of my family and joining the forum on a thursday night.keep waiting for the shame to go,told lots of people id had a lovely win.how do you tell them that i put it all back????serena why do we never learn!!!!try and keep positive take one day at a time,dont think of tomorrow,only today and post back to me,it would be nice to chat to someone who is going through the same.xx take care and try to keep smiling.


Re: Had enough - cleo - 28-03-2011

Hi serena,snap all i can think about at the minute is having a gamble,trying hard not too.i used to relate to tarot cards and horoscopes then i realised there are millions of people in the world who have the same star sign,they cant be correct for everyone.yup the minute i saw my 11 year old playing the freeplay slots i knew something had to give.had to sit and tell them the money had all gone last nite.half hour ago he came in and gave me 5 pounds towards our hol next month.made me want to cry.my bloke the same,he sat and watched me waste my money last time i gambled-i have begged him in the past to stop me.i cant blame anyone but myself,a stop button is wishful thinking.in an ideal world all cgs should have one!!!have you thought about the gambling blocker you can get for your laptop?was suggested to me last night in the chat room.once you have made the descion to stop it makes you feel a teeny tiny bit better,i still wake up in the night with disbelief at what iv done and have to jump straight out of bed in the morning cos i cant bear to lie there with my thoughts.the one day at a time is working well.day 4 and as of yet i have not gambled.xx


Re: Had enough - Barrieexgambler - 29-03-2011

Hey Girls...thats both of you!!

Seems your both sharing some experiences in what your doing but not actually getting to the whole point!!

Ga does not have shame, its not sexist, does not discriminate but it does help to stop you gambling.....

Why do your partners watch and not say anything until you loose?? probably because they prefer that than you both either being miserable, grumpy or intolerable if you have not had a bet.

See when we are in action its all we think about...when we are out of action and see the light we think about not being in action...

"just for today" I did not gamble....life was not a thrill....I sometimes think of lucky numbers...sometimes dream of being rich....but today life was normal....today i did not gamble....

most importantly because I did not gamble I won.

Seems more important than discussing what you both have in common you should take some long hard looks at yourselves and say how together can we stop, then you will know what the fellowship (sounds sexist!!) so I will say gathering of likeminded people instead is about.

Because even though I am athiest I believe an angel stands over me and reminds me every day that "god granted me the serenity to accept the things I couldnt change the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference"



you may even find if you both had that "courage" then your partners would not just ignore you whilst your engrosed on a laptop.

Sorry to be blunt ladies...gambling certainly ruined me...but I had the strength to accept and change...thanks to GA and GA and its support is what you need to gain the strength to fight.

Best Wishes.

B


Re: Had enough - cleo - 29-03-2011

Eveything you say makes perfect sense and i am trying hard.i do want to change more than anything.i admit i have a problem and thats step one.when i say i would love to attend a meeting thats the honest truth but i dont drive and public transport is not a viable option,my nearest meeting is 40-50 miles away and as a 30 year old woman wouldnt want to be out alone of an evening in a strange town.a positive step would be to find a support group-there maybe one in the next town.i can keep myself busy,change my habits,be grateful for what i have and take every day one at a time.we do have angels watching over us,if we didnt we prb wouldnt be here today and evey night i say thanks for what we have been given.thanks for the advice,it helps to hear from others who have been there,i am a great believer in the man up approach-sometimes its what we need.any other words of wisdom pass them my way!!