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im my own worst enemy
#11
Hi all, my name is Jimmy im 30 years old and im a compulsive gambler. I have a partner and 2 young children.
Heres my story.... My gambling all started when i was a kid and i started to play the fruit machines. My parents used to give me my friday night pocket money for sweets etc...,but i went and gambled it every single week. Little did i know i was hooked on gambling as a young lad. This then led to me going to the bookies for a football bet and a bet at the horses. Very rarely getting a winner!! And if that wasnt enough the bookies started to show virtual horse and dog races and i was silly enough to bet on that. My friend once said to me 'why do u think there is only 1 payout window and normally around 3 betting windows???'. I just thought it was an old cliche'. I shoulda awknowledged wat he was saying to me. But the worst was still to come, ROULETTE!!! This game has brought me to my knees, owing out thousands of ££££'s. I have lost 10's of thousands over the years and its made me a broken man. I would tell lies regulary to get to play it and get my buzz. I have won some reasonable amounts from time to time, but when i lost i lost everything and more. The problem is I never know when to quit, i used to say 1 more big hit and im done, but this never happened, i kept going and going!! There comes a point when u just have to admit defeat and say enough is enough. And thats the point im at now. Iv caused grief and heartache to my partner and my mum. This time im gona turn the tables and fix all my problems. I owe it to my kids and family. I just pray to god that i can overcome this horrible addiction. Feel free to leave me a message or comment, i would be grateful. All the best overcoming this lifethreatening disease.
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#12
hi all

im back here again surprise suprise lol well things did get a little better after hubby help sort stuff out in may time money got better and i felt better so i thought why go to meetings?? how wrong was i im still gambling not to the point im hundreds in debt like back in may luckily my bank put a stop to that after i borrowd yet more money to pay that off.. from my father in law

but im still spending money i dont have and as of today am over my agreed limit and will incure charges which i know... my hubby still checks my back account sees money gone out has a little moan what were u thiking etc.. then drops it n says its a good job i love you isnt it i ask him to unban sites so i can do the free proms but always end up puitting money on i cant stop myself... as im doing it im thinking u idiot u know ur gonna loose.. yet another side of me is like this is it... THIS TIME IL WIN lol talk about deluded its shamefull but part of me just cant not

i went to the docs about it she put on propranolol for nerves panic attacks anxiety etc as i was sending myself mental they do work and ive also lost 3st ive tackled my weight i just wish i could tackle this....

im scared of going to a meeting incase i sit there and sob like a baby and make myself look like an idiot.. but maybe thats the only way??

thanks for reading again xx
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