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Recovery is all about healthy healing I am a non religious person.
#2
(14-07-2019, 03:46 PM)gadaveuk Wrote: I am a non religious person.
The recovery program works like mountain climbers tied together with ropes who find safe and secure ways of learning and finding new skills in living a healthier life today.

The recovery program is about healing and our recovery, for me it is non religious.
Sadly healing and my recovery could not occur if I was not admitting my pains and my fears to myself.
Just for today I will not Gamble is a healthy boundary that means I no longer want to hurt myself any more.
Just for today I will not Gamble and will not smoke means I am exchanging another unhealthy habit, yet just for today I will means my dedication towards being more productive today.
My wording I used I have to indicated that my thinking was obsessive, I then worked out what were my needs, what were my wants, what were my goals, and writing them down and making my lists made me more accountable to myself.
I also became more selfish about my recovery, not doing things resentfully or reluctantly, also doing things unconditionally, to do things and not expecting any thin in return, that reduced my frustrations and my disappointments.

The recovery program works like a team of like minded people, reaching new levels of skill.

I have no control over the gambling establishments, they are there to make money.
The gambling establishments never made me do any thing I did not want to do.
The gambling establishments never lied to my family, I did.
The gambling establishments never made me steal, I did.
The gambling establishments were places I went to escape when I was emotional vulnerable and could not cope with people life and situations.
Long before my addictions and my obsessions I was risk taking, I was stealing, I was not being honest and open.
A time came when I decided to become selfish, to put as much effort in to my recovery as I put in to my addictions and obsessions.
The question is how much do I want to be healthier today, how much time and effort am I worth today.
Please keep going to meetings, you will benefit from it in so many ways.
Success is over coming procrastination and getting my needs done, getting my wants done, getting honest with Success is being the healthiest person I can be today.
Success is understanding my frustrations due to my unreasonable expectations of people life and situations. By me having unreasonable expectations of people life and situations I was effect causing myself pains time and time again. 
Success is being content sincere mature healed and whole with in myself today.
Success is understanding that by being alone and isolated on my own is not a healthy way to live my life today.
Success is understanding that I can live today with out my addiction obsessions or adversely affecting 
Success is over coming procrastination and getting my needs done, getting my wants done, getting honest with Success is being the healthiest person I can be today.
Success is honest and accountable to myself.
Success is understanding my emotional triggers, my pains not healed.
Success is understanding my my fears not faced.
Success is understanding my frustrations due to my unreasonable expectations of people life and situations. 
By me having unreasonable expectations of people life and situations I was effect causing myself pains time and time again.
Success is understanding my emotional triggers of my feelings of loneliness due to my fears of emotional intimacy.
Success is understanding my emotional triggers were my feelings of being bored. I can be honest today with out being cruel or adversely affecting other people.
Success is understanding I can embrace change towards healthy habits today.
Success is understanding I can reduce my unhealthy reactions to people life and situations.
Success is acknowledging my unhealthy reactions in anger, resentments, impatience intolerance, jealous, envy, rage, lack of trust, guilt shame regret remorse penance person pleasing vengeance mistrust self worth low self esteem indicate that I am not fully healthy and not at serenity with myself today.
Success is not taking on unhealthy peoples emotional baggage on board today.
Success is being content sincere mature healed and whole with in myself today.
Success is understanding that I work better in a team of like minded people.
Success is understanding that I can live today with out my addiction obsessions or adversely affecting myself or other people.
Success is understanding that honesty is the best policy today.
Please keep going to meetings, you will benefit from it in so many ways.
Love and peace to every one.
Dave L
AKA Dave of Beckenham
Hi

Merry Christmas to every one and your families I hope that every thing is well, it is only -35 Celsius at this time in Calgary , but who is moaning.

Once in to recovery I would start to understand that my stress and anxiety and my unhealthy reactions in my fears was of my doing.

As I started to write my reactions to people life and situations was it healthy for me to take things personally.

One of the things was Christmas, leaving things to the last minute, well in having discussion with my wife Shirley we decided to be more committed and gets things done early.

Having one committed file on my PC with all family and friends addresses so that I could get cards done early and be organized, then to keep it up to date.

Then to not try and person please people, to not live foods and things to the last minute, then at Christmas have foods ready so that we could sit down and enjoy Christmas, and then have a relaxed time with my family both Christmas and boxing day.

I now understand that Christmas is not about gifts and material things it is about having a close intimate healthy interactions, to be able to show my love intimately and spend time with people with out any fear in me.

It use to be such an unhealthy habits to live in regret, in meeting with my father after my mother took me from his pains fears and his unhealthy habits.

 In meeting with him I sadly saw m self in him, there was a suggestion from some one to listen to a track to in the living years, I had heard it so many times yet once I listened to pain flowed out and tears rolled down from my eyes.

With PTSD and deep seated trauma the pain is so unbearable it gets suppressed.

At what time or place can we peel back those heavy covers and exposed the hurt inner child in me.

I am pleased to say that for two days Christmas day and Boxing day we lived our life to the full with people that mean so much to us, I was able to hug my family give them a kiss and tell my son how much he means to me. The rewards are very simple that as I reduce my fears the people around me are able to do the same thing.

A healthy family will not live in the pains of their past or let fear hold them back from living a healthy day today.

I went to a conference some years ago, while in the USA I stayed in a hotel and one morning I woke up very early and met with man looking concerned and worried with out thinking we started to chat for about half an hour, I got up leave and the man said to me do you know what I am going today, Please tell, he told me that he was going to tell his son how much he loved him.

That to me was like dynamite, I was so amazed he was so committed to express his love to his son. There was nothing to say to that.

Sadly in todays world people will say that they love their car, they love their house, they love their money, for me love is about healthy relationships with intimacy, to have healthy intimate moments with people close to us.

If I am living in fear today I am cheating myself from having full healthy relationships and life.

Love and peace to every one.

Dave L

AKA Dave of Beckenham UK
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RE: Recovery is all about healthy healing I am a non religious person. - by gadaveuk - 27-12-2021, 10:53 AM

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