03-02-2010, 10:11 PM
Hi
i am 42 and have been a compulsive gambler for the last 10 years since my mum died. I am married and have 2 great boys but the gambling has ruined everything and i am now at the point where i feel there is no way back and i keep contemplating running away or ending it all.
I have gambled on horses and football but for the last 5 years the roulette machines have finished me off. I have remortgaged 3 times and lost in equity that i had made on house purchases - i am now in negative equity, have debts and now owe thousands to online payday advance companies which i cant pay back. I have borrowed and lied to my family and despite logging onto this site and having been to a couple of meetings i cant stop. It is now 3 days after i got paid and i have nothing left - cant get to work so will have to go off sick - how crazy is this?
Whilst my wife knows and she has stood by me i havent told any opther member of the family - probably as i dont want to be embarassed and ashamed but i know i need to let my prode go - my family think i must have loads of money in the bank and equity - the truth would just lead to them disowning me.
My main worry is never being able to get a life back and have money - i cant see how gambling will go out of my life - last Friday i was up - now i have lost that plus more - Madness !!!
Please help if you can appreciate my story and thanks for reading
i am 42 and have been a compulsive gambler for the last 10 years since my mum died. I am married and have 2 great boys but the gambling has ruined everything and i am now at the point where i feel there is no way back and i keep contemplating running away or ending it all.
I have gambled on horses and football but for the last 5 years the roulette machines have finished me off. I have remortgaged 3 times and lost in equity that i had made on house purchases - i am now in negative equity, have debts and now owe thousands to online payday advance companies which i cant pay back. I have borrowed and lied to my family and despite logging onto this site and having been to a couple of meetings i cant stop. It is now 3 days after i got paid and i have nothing left - cant get to work so will have to go off sick - how crazy is this?
Whilst my wife knows and she has stood by me i havent told any opther member of the family - probably as i dont want to be embarassed and ashamed but i know i need to let my prode go - my family think i must have loads of money in the bank and equity - the truth would just lead to them disowning me.
My main worry is never being able to get a life back and have money - i cant see how gambling will go out of my life - last Friday i was up - now i have lost that plus more - Madness !!!
Please help if you can appreciate my story and thanks for reading