25-09-2010, 03:14 PM
Hi i have been reading your post and can relate in so many ways, me and my partner been together for 11years, met as teenagers, he had a gambling problem when i met him as a young girl i had no idea about the illness. few years into our relationship he said he wanted to go ga and i went with him still a bit unsure of this addiction, wasnt long before he stopped going , year after year our realtionship got worse i got on with my life feeling he didnt want to spend time with me always letting me down. only time we would be happy was on holiday (guess there was no arcades for him to run to). then i had our daughter 3 years ago and all my attension focused on her he spent more time away , excuses after excuses where his money had gone n would go mad if i didnt beleive him, i would think i was wrong for not beleiving him, one time i remember he had hundreds to go and buy a car went out for hours and hours, i kept ringing and ringing him to get no reply when he did return he said "i left the money with the lad i can pick the car up next week" , the next week came he rang me and said you never guess wat the boy smashed the car up he had canelled the insurance as i was buying it but the worst thing he spent my money and hasnt got it to pay me back and i actually did beleive that!!!!. Anyhows a year ago he left me saying i didnt show him any love and was always on his case, he no freedom, i was heartbroken then few months later came aross a Gam anon booklet they had give me all those years ago and then it all clicked why how realtionship been so bad and i actually realzied this illness, i tried to explain to him and said i would be by his side to help him however he pushed me away. the gambling has got 100 times worse as he thinks e dont have to explain to me where he has been and where is money has gone we got back together a few times he has broke down saying he realizes he needs help but avoids attending meetings, then wen things are looking good he will disappear for the weekend , i am struggling but i have to step out his life and he needs to turn to G/A for himself he now at a point that he thinks he no good for me or his daugheter, however will love him some much and want to be a happy family but e just not changing:-(. everyday i think ov it. i handle it alot better now thou, pay day comes knowing he going to let us down i would normally keep ringing on send a nasty msg now i dont and he realizing his own mistakes and has no way ov blaming me as i am not in the wrong( he was very good at putting all his guilt onto me and it hurts) i would love to go to gam anon again feel i understand the program alot better now. i hope i do get my family back he is suh a wonderful guy always said if only he didnt gamble but no now he always will unless he goes to G.A.