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stopped four years wow what a difference...
#1
Hey All,
My name is Barrie and I am a compulsive gambler, I often post back e-mails to the Uk as I am living overseas, to people within my group I feel it gives a therapy so going to do the same on here. All wives of gamblers, people who gamble and want to stop please read. I started gambling when I can remember earning my first decent wage, was just fun back then 15-16. By 18 i lived away from home would gamble often and was always skint. Gambling never ceased i couldnt control it, it was in my veins, paid gamble, paid gamble. Fortunately my parents bailed me out a little and we started a business, I was the "dreamer" but we made money, I continued to do my wages weekly. Until I met a woman who I settled down with then in my mind I knew I couldnt control money and thought this may do it. Nope one year later in hot water as I explained why we couldnt pay the rent....eventually she left after a lot of pain. I got on my feet a little by abstaining, so you know, to me a few pounds or thousands of pounds doesnt matter, the more fuel the bigger the fire, thats the "compulsive" side of the desease that I didnt understand. Problem was with abstaining from lots of small fires- often went to some huge fires that went for weeks..at this time I didnt have family to control this and to be honest I knew i wanted to stop but simply couldnt. So I made a huge change in my life and left the Uk, I left the security also of a good business that i would have severely damaged in the future if I continued gambling to hit my "rock bottom" . This was a good thing because why should my family jeopordise all they have strived to get to fuel my addiction, it in turn made me a man. I am going to say that GA is a fantastic group of people, I cried many times when opening upto what I was but you must take the first step and want to be helped, want to concede you are powerless against something you cannot control. To be somewhere I felt understood was 2 hours of relief, now however I am strong against this desease, im foccussed and to all who read I urge if you have this desease the bookie will not give a sympathetic arm to your shoulder, desperation comes from situations that through time and focus on a better life you can resolve. I now have different goals, family, children, business and future these are my objectives in life.....and its all because God Granted me the serenity to accept the things I couldnt change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference....in my mind long may it continue...
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stopped four years wow what a difference... - by Barrieexgambler - 25-09-2010, 07:44 AM

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