25-12-2010, 11:24 AM
My name is Andy and Im a compulsive gambler,here now on xmas day,some 220 days without a bet,I sit here all lonely and sad,yet again on a xmas day,as have done for at least the last 10 years plus.
Cant remember when the last time I had a happy time,maybe thats why I detest stinking xmas time.
Was this all a result of my gambling for the past 25 years?Or is it that I am so depressed and mentally destroyed inside that I cant face being with family that I have left,as I dont have many friends in fact ive probably only got 1 friend in life and he is very happily married with children so there wont be know going out with any friends for me.
All I can say is that I havent gambled for 220 days and wont gamble today.
So I guess thats something,but I know I have to keep going to meetings which I still havent done for over 2 months.I dont want to go back to that hideous existance again as I know it will kill me if I do.
Still always broke and skint as always despite not gambling,but I HATE gambling,HATE,HATE,HATE,with all my heart and dont want the torture of it again.
I just feel so low and sad today,I will be glad when the festive period is over,I HATE it.
Andy
Cant remember when the last time I had a happy time,maybe thats why I detest stinking xmas time.
Was this all a result of my gambling for the past 25 years?Or is it that I am so depressed and mentally destroyed inside that I cant face being with family that I have left,as I dont have many friends in fact ive probably only got 1 friend in life and he is very happily married with children so there wont be know going out with any friends for me.
All I can say is that I havent gambled for 220 days and wont gamble today.
So I guess thats something,but I know I have to keep going to meetings which I still havent done for over 2 months.I dont want to go back to that hideous existance again as I know it will kill me if I do.
Still always broke and skint as always despite not gambling,but I HATE gambling,HATE,HATE,HATE,with all my heart and dont want the torture of it again.
I just feel so low and sad today,I will be glad when the festive period is over,I HATE it.
Andy