05-09-2011, 11:16 PM
I went to my first meeting tonight. I was totally terrified and nearly went home especially when I was having problems finding the exact address. I found it though and straight away everyone was very friendly and reassured me that things could only get better now I've made the first step.
In the meeting itself, I got a lot from hearing other peoples therapies, and was not only surprized by the number of people (I was expecting 3-4, not a room full!) but by how much people had in common with me. After the break, I gave my therapy along with some other new people. I was never intending to do that, but I had been talking to a couple of people in the break and suddenly thought when the chairperson asked if I wanted to give my therapy that seeing as I've not only made it there, but also been speaking to a couple of people during the break, I'm over half way there so might as well get it over and done with instead of not doing then still having the extra anxiety of having to give my first therapy every week till I do it.
I'm actually thinking now that because I felt comfortable in tonights group, that I'm going to make it my main group and then if I feel I need to go to an extra meeting I have the option of the Friday one.
I'm feeling more confident now than I have been doing, and it feels like a big weight has been lifted now that I have said it out loud. I've even taken the first steps towards blocking gambling sites on my computer (probably got a good chunk of bingo sites blocked now and a couple of other ones that I thought off from the top of my head) although I've still got the rest of the computers on the network to do as my router is rubbish and won't let me block them at the router so I have to do each computer individually.
Today I haven't gambled. I will ask for the same strength again tomorrow.
Kez
In the meeting itself, I got a lot from hearing other peoples therapies, and was not only surprized by the number of people (I was expecting 3-4, not a room full!) but by how much people had in common with me. After the break, I gave my therapy along with some other new people. I was never intending to do that, but I had been talking to a couple of people in the break and suddenly thought when the chairperson asked if I wanted to give my therapy that seeing as I've not only made it there, but also been speaking to a couple of people during the break, I'm over half way there so might as well get it over and done with instead of not doing then still having the extra anxiety of having to give my first therapy every week till I do it.
I'm actually thinking now that because I felt comfortable in tonights group, that I'm going to make it my main group and then if I feel I need to go to an extra meeting I have the option of the Friday one.
I'm feeling more confident now than I have been doing, and it feels like a big weight has been lifted now that I have said it out loud. I've even taken the first steps towards blocking gambling sites on my computer (probably got a good chunk of bingo sites blocked now and a couple of other ones that I thought off from the top of my head) although I've still got the rest of the computers on the network to do as my router is rubbish and won't let me block them at the router so I have to do each computer individually.
Today I haven't gambled. I will ask for the same strength again tomorrow.
Kez