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The Journey Begins
#36
This disease we carry never fails to try to deliver it's poison.

With my holidays, and last week I had a works do on the Sunday to attend, my GA meetings have been minimal.
I have missed going, and this last week the devil has been on my shoulder every day trying to tempt me to place a bet.

Several times, I have had the time, money and been on my own but from somewhere I've found a resolve to not let the devil win. I don't know where these feelings came from, perhaps I've been overly complacent, perhaps through a lack of attendance, it's allowed some creep in my mind, and these thoughts have bubbled up.

Thankfully though, I have been to a meeting and I come out of it with a sense of relief, that a) I didn't fold and haven't placed a bet, and b) I reset my internal barrier, and have only a few days before my next meeting.

I will not give in to this. I will stay strong, and I will keep going to meetings. Our group continues to grow, and the new members re-inforce just what we've been through in the early stages of recovery. It's tough getting past the habit. I realise this is a battle that will be in my existence every day.

A different sort of post from me. I am slightly ashamed in that the thoughts were so strong, and so persistent, I had begin to think that I was getting to a sense of normal.

Normal though for me is to keep up with the programme, and work harder to go to additional meetings when it's not possible to fit in my regular one. Perhaps I'll even travel to a neighbouring town, do any of you guys do that?

Anyway, I've avoided temptation and this is day 278 of abstinence.

Best wishes, stay strong, you can all do it.

STS
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Messages In This Thread
The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 09-01-2018, 08:30 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 13-01-2018, 09:46 AM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 17-01-2018, 04:43 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 23-01-2018, 09:17 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by Simmo - 24-01-2018, 11:18 AM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 01-02-2018, 09:44 AM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 13-02-2018, 05:29 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by Simmo - 13-02-2018, 05:47 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 20-02-2018, 10:51 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 28-02-2018, 12:07 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by Simmo - 28-02-2018, 12:28 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 06-03-2018, 10:41 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 12-03-2018, 11:19 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 20-03-2018, 10:48 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 27-03-2018, 06:36 AM
RE: The Journey Begins - by smartie - 28-03-2018, 06:51 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 29-03-2018, 10:21 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 06-04-2018, 02:27 AM
RE: The Journey Begins - by Simmo - 06-04-2018, 03:21 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 19-04-2018, 06:48 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 01-05-2018, 07:58 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by Simmo - 01-05-2018, 09:08 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 09-05-2018, 12:49 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by Simmo - 09-05-2018, 01:49 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 09-05-2018, 04:09 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 30-05-2018, 09:46 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by Simmo - 31-05-2018, 11:03 AM
RE: The Journey Begins - by Simmo - 03-07-2018, 11:48 AM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 07-07-2018, 01:40 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by Simmo - 09-07-2018, 08:41 AM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 19-07-2018, 09:49 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 01-08-2018, 09:22 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by Simmo - 01-08-2018, 09:39 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 02-09-2018, 08:25 AM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 18-09-2018, 07:43 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by Chris_b - 18-09-2018, 10:39 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 11-10-2018, 10:17 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by Chris_b - 12-10-2018, 09:15 AM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 30-12-2018, 09:48 AM
RE: The Journey Begins - by shoebox - 07-01-2019, 12:30 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 20-06-2019, 06:37 AM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 20-05-2020, 02:45 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by shoebox - 21-05-2020, 08:06 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by gadaveuk - 04-07-2020, 05:48 AM

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