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Breaking Pattern
#11
(12-12-2018, 10:00 PM)Furious Wrote: 22:00: Day 3 completed

What does day completed mean to you Furious?
Meetings help, but meetings are only a small part to how GA works....

GA is a 12 step organisation that offers the program that keeps me in recovery...

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#12
Day 4
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#13
Day 4 completed
I don't know, I know I get satisfaction from achievement. Temporary relief from progress and goals. It helps me think I am doing well in life.
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#14
one day at a time, each day without gambling is a success. Keep moving forrward.
One day at a time.  My last bet was 15/03/2016 and I hope and pray each day that it stays that way.
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#15
Day 5 completed

I am struggling with some thoughts. For example, I decided I owed it to myself to repay my own gambling debt via none gambling means. But in reality I am finding it impossible to be content with selling things online for very small money. It takes a long time and a lot of social interaction I do not feel ready for.

Anyway, also thinking about sites where I may have some unintentional credit left in them and the only way to get the money out is to gamble more with nothing to lose. I saw my mind trying to convince myself it would be okay to bet, if for example, I had money in an account and the only way to get it out would be to gamble it to a high enough amount to withdraw.

Technically it makes logical sense but realistically it goes against my 90 day rule. Another thing I am concerned about is after 90 days what happens. Like I have seen other people do 90 days and then relapse. I figure the only way for me to find out is to do it. But in general I have a bad feeling about abstaining from things.

What I mean is I am likely to abstain for 90 days just to prove I can do it, and then put on a bet afterwards just because. Maybe a good idea would be, after 90 days, to spend what I have earned by non gambling in that time.

In general the problem is always that I cannot, as in I am not able to function enough to earn enough, more than I can gamble. Yes, I can lose more from gambling, but it doesn't solve the first problem. How am I going to be able to function properly enough to earn.

This is probably the most difficult.
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#16
Day 6
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#17
Furious As you get further away from gambling your mind will become clearer and all this mixed up thinking that you have will start to make sense. It's only been 6 days and you are already trying to change the world.
Slow down, just enjoy not gambling for now. Sorting out finances can come later, maybe a week, maybe three months later, but you'll know when you have clarity of thought. At the moment you are still thinking like a compulsive gambler, thinking of using money in accounts to try to win to escape reality. The truth is the financial mess you may be in will sort itself out by staying off gambling. When ready you can look at a proper repayment plan with your debtors. Slowly and surely is better than quick and mistake filled.
Find a meeting and talk all these thoughts through with others who understand and have been through it themselves.
Have a good day.
How do I stop gambling?

Honesty.
Open-minded.
Willingness.


Chris.
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#18
Day 6. Today I sold something but I keep thinking about how little it is in comparison to how much I gambled. I also think of I bet I would have put on coming through. I also think others would not have come through so I am not as annoyed. In general I am still up by not following through.
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#19
Day 7. 03:51.
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#20
Hi Furious

It took me 3 years after I first got help for my gambling problem to pay off debts caused by my addiction, small steps. When I finally had some money in my pocket I decided to book a trip to the Highlands in Scotland with my Partner instead of paying extra on what I owed, because I felt that if I look after me, then I will be in a good place to look after others i.e debts.
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