Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
One day at a time
#1
Hi all,

My name is James - I am a compulsive gambler.

I am new here, but as a reader I thought I would introduce myself.

I am 27, and I have been gambling for as long as I can remember. I must of been around 8 years old when I had my first gamble in the local arcades. I would gamble my pocket money, and then when I started to earn on my paper round when I was 13 I would gamble that. I got a full time job, and I would gamble all my wages on fruit machines in the arcade, and then when I turned 18 I would gamble it in the pubs too. I would make my girlfriend stand next to fruit machines for hours on end while I wasted all mine/our money on them, money that could of been spent on us having a good time. I have been with my girlfriend since I was 14 years old, and until 4 weeks ago she thought that I had pretty much given up gambling, and would just have the occassional small accumalator on the football on a Saturday afternoon. Little did she know that I have been leading a horrible, and evil lie over the past few years, and I have had to hide it from her the whole time, because when I messed up a couple of years back, and she bailed me out with money then, she swore that if it happened again then she would leave. She didn't realise the full extent of my illness at the time, and thought that she would scare me into not doing it again. Through no fault of her own, she thought she was helping. I slowly got back into trouble gambling, and about a year ago it got out of control when I got introduced to roullette machines in the bookies. THIS CRAZY FORM OF GAMBLING WOULD END UP BEING TO MUCH FOR MY COMPULIVE GAMBLING. I soon found myself spending my months wages within a few hours of getting paid. I I earn pretty decent money for someone my age. Every day of the month would be a struggle, and I borrowed money from my best friend, My Mum, and even my managing director in order to keep my secret life away from my loving girlfriend. The bank was on my case as the small overdraft they had allowed me was incurring charges every month, and they eventually got hold of me and arranged for me to pay a manageable amount each month for 4 months so I could get out of the red. This is how it all came to a halt. The bank sent a message to our house phone, and my girlfriend had heard it. The next day she questioned me about it, and in one last horrible sickening attemp, I tried to lie my way out of it. I couldn't though, and I knew deep down in my stomach that the horrible lie of a life I had been leading was just about to come to a crashing end. I broke down in tears, and couldn't stop shaking - begging my girlfriend not to leave me, even before I had told her what was going on. She had an incline, but thought she could trust me. Not knowing the true illness of a compulsive gambler. I told her EVERYTHING, and she said that she would support me, and that as a team we would get through this. From that moment I had a hige weight lifted from my shoulders. The first 2 things we had to do was to sort the finances, and then sort my illness. I told her that I had already found out about the ga meetings, and that I wanted to go, but I could not think of an excuse to tell her every Wednesday in order to go. Anyway, on December 23rd 2009 I went to my first ga meeting. I said this to my girlfriend after last weeks meeting, and seeing my first newbie - IT TAKES A BIG MAN/WOMAN TO WALK IN THAT ROOM FOR THE FIRST TIME!! I was terrified I must admit. Within minutes I felt at ease, and couldn't believe what a decent bunch of people were there. It made me realise that I am not on my own in life. After that meeting I felt great. It has not been easy, but I have not gambled since that day. I look forward to my meetings every week, and I know that with my meetings and the help of my fiends, and family, I can get through this. I hope anyone reading this will see that the meetings are without doubt the most important thing in the world if you want to stop gambling.
Thank you for reading.

My name is James - I am a compulsive gamber, and just for today we will not gamble. If you win you lose, and if you lose you lose.
Reply
#2
Hi James

Good on you.

Inspirational post for all to read.

Look after your girlfriend, she sounds like a beauty.

Best Wishes
Roy
Reply


Forum Jump:


Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)