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How do I stop this?
#1
I have just joined the site and haven't really read any other postings. I guess my story will be very similar to other peoples story. I am married, with a young son. I started gambling on slot machines in my teens. I knew I was addicated to them, but didn't gamble on anything else. I used to spend most of my wages when I started to work on these. One New Years resolution about 14 years ago I decided to stop and haven't touched one since. However about five years ago I started to gamble online at the casino's. At first it was occasionally and for small amounts. However almost from the day my wife got pregnant until now ( about 4 1/2 years ) I have spent hours each day online gambling. I had a good job, but spent all my surplus money online. I then started to get in debt and found myself owing to credit cards. I then had a lucky win online and cleared this debt. I thought I had got out of jail. Instead of stopping I got worse. Just over six months later I found myself thousands in debt. Again I managed to make money on the stock market and paid off this debt. I vowed never to gamble again. Yet three months later I was losing money again. I lost my job twelve months ago and have still continued to gamble. This time I find myself in debt again, but this time I have no real income. Everytime I seem to get back in front I fall further behind. My wife has no idea about my debts. Until that time I had spent lost "only" a few thousand online. I feel I have no control of my life. I feel like I am in a bubble. I cannot concentrate on anything else. I do not spend much time with my wife or son. I am just amazed how I have managed to hide this for so long. I now think what a difference that money would make to our lives. Please can some one help. I cannot attend a GA meeting as under no circumstances can I let my wife find out, as that way she would find out about my debts. Any help or suggestions would be great.
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#2
Hi, Your story sounds very familiar to me and it's what most compulsive gamblers do through out their lives.
Secrets will eventually kill us and if your really want to get into recovery from this illness you will need to tell your wife everything without leaving anything out. the only thing that I know that works for us people is GA. I'm sure there is rehabilition homes that you can go into short term and these may help but GA is a lifelong program as this illness will never go away on it's own. I think that knowing why we are compulsive gamblers is not important but treating it is imperative. Ring a GA hotline and see if you can talk to someone there and tell them what you have said on here, I'm pretty sure they will tell you the same thing as I have.
When we cross the line into compulsive gambling there is no turning back and I believe that it can never be controlled.
All GA requires is that you admit and are willing to do something about your gambling.
I send you my best wishes and hope you get the help that you and your family deserve.
Regards
Helen GA Australia
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