04-05-2010, 12:18 AM
Hi
Reading all your posts i feel that im not alone now than i thought i was. i have been to hell and back in the past 15 yrs, i started when i was 16 on fruit machines then went to horses and has progressively gotten worse over this past 15 yrs. i have 2 children and a partner who i have taken to hell and back with me we have split up so many times over my gambling and out of control spending now on gala bingo, i feel i have a addictive personality and have many times cut myself to cope with what i have put my family through i desperately want to stop this but can never seem to keep away from this devil. i have inside me to spend what ever money i have on gamlbing. i dont want to hurt my family anymore i have wanted to make them free of this as they dont deserve what i put on them but i just cry, cut myself and feel i dont deserve to have a family. my partner has arthritis and my oldest son has anger problem most probably caused by me and my youngest son has autism and it is so hard dealing with all this i find comfort in gambling it takes me away from my hurt and i feel as i need it to help me cope i know its wrong. i find myself asking my mum for money and lie to get it saying i need it for food electric etc then as soon as i get it its gone on gambling. im at the end now where i either want to go as ive had enough and my family deserve better, or i need to really get this done. i wish i could have got some sort of help yrs ago but never knew what i was doing and now all i do is cry and feel so down because i gamble and gamble because i feel down i want out either way i need help anyone please thank you
Reading all your posts i feel that im not alone now than i thought i was. i have been to hell and back in the past 15 yrs, i started when i was 16 on fruit machines then went to horses and has progressively gotten worse over this past 15 yrs. i have 2 children and a partner who i have taken to hell and back with me we have split up so many times over my gambling and out of control spending now on gala bingo, i feel i have a addictive personality and have many times cut myself to cope with what i have put my family through i desperately want to stop this but can never seem to keep away from this devil. i have inside me to spend what ever money i have on gamlbing. i dont want to hurt my family anymore i have wanted to make them free of this as they dont deserve what i put on them but i just cry, cut myself and feel i dont deserve to have a family. my partner has arthritis and my oldest son has anger problem most probably caused by me and my youngest son has autism and it is so hard dealing with all this i find comfort in gambling it takes me away from my hurt and i feel as i need it to help me cope i know its wrong. i find myself asking my mum for money and lie to get it saying i need it for food electric etc then as soon as i get it its gone on gambling. im at the end now where i either want to go as ive had enough and my family deserve better, or i need to really get this done. i wish i could have got some sort of help yrs ago but never knew what i was doing and now all i do is cry and feel so down because i gamble and gamble because i feel down i want out either way i need help anyone please thank you