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Sneaky Liar!!!
#1
Hi,

Read an article from a women because her Husband is a Gambler, I know where she is coming from but im the gambler who is lying to his wife. I feel so terrible every single day, my wife has given me chance after chance after chance and yetI still have not taken it. I have stopped from time to time but I end up back there again. It starts off with a few punds here and there, then before you know it hundreds have been lost. Then the lies start, I have been telling my wife for the past 5 months that there is more money in the bank than there actually is, and now its caught up with me, if I had just come clean in the first place then ok she would have been angry and disappointed but now after all these stupid lies she will never ever trust me again and why should she, you here it on films all of the time I dont deserve someone like this, they are too good for me but this is certainly true for me. Gambling wreck lives and marriages and mine is def on the brink, I have self excluded my self from every gambling website I use and have cut up my debit card. Im 32 years old and cant be trusted wit a debit card how very very sad is that but its something that I have to face, hopefully my wife will find the tiniest little bit of respect she has for me inside somewhere but I just dont know. Just want to say to everyone take a look at what you have and dont throw it away just for the thrill of doubling your money its really not worth being this miserable all of the time!!!
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#2
Hi ya

Just read your post. You mention about no longer having your debit card etc because your cant be trusted. Maybe that should be seen as a a good thing not a bad thing that you dont have your debit card because you are begginging to put barriers in place to stop the gambling which is good. Just take a small bit of money out with you that you need to the day and then there is no worries about what you could have had if you had a debit card because you still then having your money for your lunch or whatever items you need through out the day. I have only been attending GA for 4 weeks i no longer have a debit card with me but i have began to like that in a way not having it because i have not got that tempation in my pocket then during my lunch breaks etc to go of and gamble a few quid. at the end of the day what i have began to realise in the last month it aint the customer that wins its the bookies etc that are sat rubbing there hands together at the end of the day.

Just take things a day at a time mate that is what i am having to do myself because thinking 5 days ahead etc and thinking to much in advance causes me negativity. Maybe attend GA meetings or something, or try looking at the just for todays in the literature if you have previously been to GA. Just remember starting with one day at a time.
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#3
Hi Brucie1986

You haven't said whether you attend GA.

If not, then that is the first thing you should do. You are very unlikely to abstain from gambling for any period of time without the proper support.
Your wife would also gain an insight into the gambler's world by attending GAMANON.

Might I suggest that the earlier you tell her, the better it is going to get. You aren't going to gain anything by delaying. Be prepared to tell her what you are planning to do to put yourself on the road to recovery. i.e. attend GA... Then stick to what you have planned.

Trust will eventually return to your relationship. To what degree, I don't know.
Once you start regaining that trust though, don't break it. As you have probably learned, every time you fall off the wagon, trust is a longer time coming back.

As your previous reply said... ' one day at a time '. I have never tried for any goals, or anniversaries. I don't need that extra pressure.

Best wishes
Roy
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