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sound familiar?
first and foremost, I am a compulsive gambler.

I have just had a sit-down with my partner, then my parents and then the in-laws, and I feel so much better for it, although certainly not at the time(s).

I have been told a few home truths, and it is sinking in now.

I am 34 yrs old, started gambling around 17ish yr old, as you do couple of pints saturday afternoon, fixed odds football coupon, then progressing onto horses, greyhounds slot machines.

At 20yr old I met my partner, bought a flat had a baby boy, 4 yrs later we were in thousands of debt, everyone thought at the time it was due to the baby and new flat, holidays etc.
Both sets parents helped out and got us clear.
Everyone now knows I let them down all those years ago as it was mostly down to gambling.

At 30 yr old we had another boy, bought a new house, made a tidy profit from the flat sale.
Now, 4 yrs later, we find ourselves in many thousands of debt, going through debt management co. to sort it out.

I've been losing regular amounts of money per week for at least a year now, the many thousands of debt I would say is mostly gambling, but my partner agrees that holidays, furnishings etc have played a part, but no doubt about it at least 60% was me.

For the past couple of months roullette machines in the bookies have been where the money has went, and more recently when the wife is in bed, roullete/blackjack online.

I don't know why I started online, as it is a joint bank account we have and there is no way my wife wouldn't have noticed.
As I have realised for some time now that the elusive big win just aint gonna happen, I like to think that by betting online I was subconsiously(sp) crying for help.
Or was I just not caring about getting found out?
At the moment, I don't honestly know which is the truth.

I do know that I feel better now that my family know, they have all offered any support I need, BUT I need to stop NOW.

My wife has made it clear that if it continues then either I'm out the door, or she'll take the kids and go.

Now, I don't have any access to our bank account, and due to the credit management co. a credit card is impossible.

I haven't gambled since last Saturday, mostly I freely admit to being the result of a big showdown with the wife on Sunday after she noticed money missing from my late night Saturday night roullete session.
So, since last Sunday I have had no access to money.

At this point in time, I have no inclination to enter either a bookie shop or an online bookie.

The test I imagine will be when I have money in my pocket, which I know will burn like hell.

I think I can beat this, as I stopped smoking with no help whatsoever, I smoked for around 10 years from age 15ish, and have not, hand on heart, smoked for 10 years roughly.

The big question is, do I need to go to a meeting?
I loathe talking in public, but have no qualms (as you will realise after reading all this) about typing my problems, and there are no beginners meetings in my area.
no you don't need to go to meeting - see posts years of hurt !!

I have not been to a meeting just post on here as no 1 knows i gamble !

I am now in to day 31 without gambling - I just keep saying to myself not going to gamble as I will have to start counting the days again !!

In my head if I start gambling now just lost 31 days & counting - It works for me trying to see how many days I will go & the way its going I am enjoying life without gambling - so hopefully keep going & I will have cracked it - It works for me at the moment !! <!-- sBig Grin --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_biggrin.gif" alt="Big Grin" title="Very Happy" /><!-- sBig Grin -->

But everyone is differant all the best which ever way you do it <!-- sWink --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_wink.gif" alt="Wink" title="Wink" /><!-- sWink -->
Hi stopnow, cheers for your vote of confidence.

I have now went over a week without gambling.

Wife was working a backshift last night, and after kids were settled in bed, and I had sunk a couple of beers I suddenly had an urge to jump online and plays a few hands or a few spins of roullete.
Purely I think out of habit, as thats what i've done in the past couple of months late fri/sat night after/during a few beers.

I resisted the urge.
I thought seriously about it, and despite having no bank card visa etc, I remembered that my card details were saved in my online account, as previously you only needed to enter the 3 digit code from the back, which I have memorised by now.

So I could have easliy went on and gambled, and seeing as I had just been paid, I had a fair bit sitting there.

I feel much better for not doing it, and I haven't missed the usual fixed odds coupon either this weekend, if anything its meant I can actually enjoy the football, as opposed to willing someone to score/win!!

Onwards & Upwards, I WILL beat this, no rephrase that, I AM beating this.
Hi Andy

I am a compulsive gambler. In my 15 months of attending GA I have heard of only ONE instance where someone has remained gamble free by going it alone. It will be easier for you to stop if you have the support that a GA meeting can offer you.

Re your credit card... <!-- sConfusedhock: --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_eek.gif" alt="Confusedhock:" title="Shocked" /><!-- sConfusedhock: --> I would seriously advise you consider cancelling it. If you have memorised the credit card numbers, it is just like having cash burning a hole in your pocket. Temptation will probably get the better of you. <!-- sConfusedhock: --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_eek.gif" alt="Confusedhock:" title="Shocked" /><!-- sConfusedhock: -->

Best wishes with whatever you choose
Hi Andy,

I am a compulsive Gambler

Firstly, Well done for having the courage to speak to your family about your gambling, i can imagine the relief you must have felt after all the weight was lifted. Like yourself, i have put my family through the pains and strains of living with a compulsive gambler for a number of years.

Just wanted to share with you my thoughts on GA Meetings.

I have been going to GA meetings for just over 3 weeks now after plucking up the courage to walk through the door. What i can tell you is the day i walked in was the best day of my life. You are not judged or critisised but are made to feel welcome by other people from all walks of life who are no different to yourself as we all share the same illness. By making your post, it is likely that you wish to stop gambling, no one can tell you what to do, you will decide yourself, but the rooms of GA will offer you a santuary where you can just observe if that is what you wish and if you feel like you want to commence your theropy and talk, you will be able to at your own time with no pressure.

I am on day 18 without Gambling and look forward to day 19 tomorrow, this i could not have done on my own, it has been the visits to the rooms that has helped me on my journey. I hope the decision you make whatever it is, will be the right one for you.
Hi Andy,
This is my first time posting on here. I am a compulsive gambler and had my last bet on 7th march 2004. What i will say is that i would not have got this far without attending regular ga meetings. Even though i have a very stubborn character and thought i could do this alone ,i really did struggle and without the help and support of fellow ga members i know i would not have come this far.
I will give you a lttle background to my story.My dad used to take me to the dog racing at an early age and even put bets on for me while watching saturday afternoon horse racing (not blaming him by the way) and from then on i had the gambling bug. Whilst a teenager i would only have a saturday flutter,once i started work things just went downhill. I was regularly lending money to gamble and the worst point altogether was when my wife was seriously ill and we had no money i still could not stop.I was crying out to be found out and to confess all but was placing large bets on my telephone account as i had a separate account from my wife. Anyway to cut a long story short i had a bank statement come to the house and my other half opened this and all hell broke loose. She gave me an ultimatum, out the door or get help-now, if that was me it just would of been out the door. I really hope you beat this as it is very hard and i still have the urge to place a bet, but you must get in touch with your local ga meeeting. All the best
Thanks for all your kind words.

Yes, hard as it was, I felt a lot lot better for telling my wife, parents & in-laws.

I visited all the bookies I previously frequented tonight after work (3 in total)
I had money in my pocket, as I had to put petrol in the car.

I could have easily gambled that money, or some of it at least, I never, I never had any inclination of gambling whatsoever.

I picked up self-exclusion forms to ban myself.

I am beating this.

onwards & upwards.
Hi roy,

thanks for your kind words.

I haven't memorised my credit card detials which would enable me to gamdle online.

My Debit Card number is stored, (as everyones is), in my online casino/bookie accounts, you need only remember the 3 digit numbe rfrom the back of your card for instant credit.

At this point in time my wife has not cancelled my card but she has physically taken it from me.

I can easily go online at any time and deposit funds and gamble.

When I stopped smoking I ensured I had a pack handy, but resisted the urge.

I am trying the same technique with my gambling, I know I have instant access to a gambling facilitly online.

I am abstaining, and have no inclination to gamble.

My wife and my 2 children are far far more important to me.

If I gamble, I will lose more than money, I will lose my family.

Someone at work today actually made a comment that I seemed 'more cheery than normal' and 'had I won the lottery or something'.

I take that that means I am more friendly/approachable/affiable.

onwards & upwards

I am beating this.
Hi all,

I have still resisted the urge to gamble.

I have had very limited funds from my wife for the past couple of weeks now, and through my own choice I have given her receipts for all purchases i have made, shopping/petrol etc.

I am getting over this as I still have the ability to gamble at any time I want, as I've said previously I don't physically have a debit card as we both decided its for the best that I don't have it, as it hasn't been cancelled I can bet online any time I wish, BUT my wife will find out instantly (or next day anyway).

I cannot enter a bookies as I have self-excluded myself from them all.

I am getting over this with the knowledge I can bet anytime I want online, BUT my wife and kids mean more to me than a gambling session.

I'm beating this, SO CAN YOU.

thanks for reading, hopefully my story influences others to stop.

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