15-05-2010, 10:53 PM
Hello to the GA forum - I know you've read countless stories, well here is mine.
I've lost thousands on sports betting and "skill gaming", money that I simply couldn't afford to lose. I'm at university - bursary blown. I'm living with parents - any chance of helping them out and contributing to bills - blown. I have credit card debt that I could have started to pay off - blown. I've cleaned myself out to the last few pounds of my account.
WHY must I be so bloody STUPID?
I installed a filter trial, it worked well, then, like an idiot I uninstalled, thinking I'd gained some control of myself - I haven't and now I've paid for a full licensed version. I have a feeling it will be the best money I ever spend.
I can't believe what I've done, and I feel as though I've dug myself a hole, barely possible to get out of. I feel like a paralysed snail trying to climb Everest.
So, what is my solution?
Thankfully, I'm not COMPLETELY skint yet - I will save everything I can from NOW
My ideal scenario is that I desparately need a job. I can hear some of you reading this saying "yes, but you'll just blow it again". I honestly don't think I will. Seeing money that I've worked for, that it took me x amount of hours to get, blown in a single night is not my idea of a good time. I think not getting a job put me at a low ebb and gambling was a way to fill a hole. This isn't meant to be an excuse. I'm just trying to make sense of what I've done to myself and my family.
Why did I put myself in this situation? I think it was the lure of "easy" money, which I really should have known was easy money for the bookies. Also, I don't know if others feel this, but any sense of enjoyment in what you're doing quickly drains out of you. It's as if I was on auto-pilot, chasing losses and spending ridiculous amounts without really realising and looking at the amounts I was spending - until of course I lost it and reality kicked in.
I'm sorry if this comes across as very long-winded, but I have to do this NOW before I destroy myself. Tomorrow needs to be a fresh start or else I don't know what I'll do. Because I've been thoughtless and greedy I can't help out the way I should do when it comes to paying for stuff. All I need is for a chance to WORK my way out of this situation and try to get back on an even keel.
Change starts NOW.
I've lost thousands on sports betting and "skill gaming", money that I simply couldn't afford to lose. I'm at university - bursary blown. I'm living with parents - any chance of helping them out and contributing to bills - blown. I have credit card debt that I could have started to pay off - blown. I've cleaned myself out to the last few pounds of my account.
WHY must I be so bloody STUPID?
I installed a filter trial, it worked well, then, like an idiot I uninstalled, thinking I'd gained some control of myself - I haven't and now I've paid for a full licensed version. I have a feeling it will be the best money I ever spend.
I can't believe what I've done, and I feel as though I've dug myself a hole, barely possible to get out of. I feel like a paralysed snail trying to climb Everest.
So, what is my solution?
Thankfully, I'm not COMPLETELY skint yet - I will save everything I can from NOW
My ideal scenario is that I desparately need a job. I can hear some of you reading this saying "yes, but you'll just blow it again". I honestly don't think I will. Seeing money that I've worked for, that it took me x amount of hours to get, blown in a single night is not my idea of a good time. I think not getting a job put me at a low ebb and gambling was a way to fill a hole. This isn't meant to be an excuse. I'm just trying to make sense of what I've done to myself and my family.
Why did I put myself in this situation? I think it was the lure of "easy" money, which I really should have known was easy money for the bookies. Also, I don't know if others feel this, but any sense of enjoyment in what you're doing quickly drains out of you. It's as if I was on auto-pilot, chasing losses and spending ridiculous amounts without really realising and looking at the amounts I was spending - until of course I lost it and reality kicked in.
I'm sorry if this comes across as very long-winded, but I have to do this NOW before I destroy myself. Tomorrow needs to be a fresh start or else I don't know what I'll do. Because I've been thoughtless and greedy I can't help out the way I should do when it comes to paying for stuff. All I need is for a chance to WORK my way out of this situation and try to get back on an even keel.
Change starts NOW.