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Can anyone relate?
#1
Hi my names Gerry and I am a compulsive gambler. I have been a member of GA for over 8 years <!-- sConfusedhock: --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_eek.gif" alt="Confusedhock:" title="Shocked" /><!-- sConfusedhock: --> I feel old just writing that! My problem seems that I have no will to attend meetings anymore. It is not that i do feel i am cured, far from it. It isn't that I'm 'recovered' or anything like that, it is that i'm sick of hearing the constant drivel at meetings. It seems that certain members do not wish to try and recover, they would rather stay sick and keep others around them sick. They seem to have accepted that they have an illness and found a way of living with it rather than trying to recover a day at a time. I have been at meetings were people openly mock the programme and say its 'too deep'! I have no idea what that actually means! The fellowship seems to be nothing more than a clique which is a tradegy as it has the tools to help so many but this isn't being utilised. The lack of a format at most meetings is meaning we are placing the importance on the illness rather than how to recover, and anyone actually daring to mention a higher power is shot down or made to feel uncomfotable, or is just not asked to speak anymore. In a long winded way all I'm trying to say is we are guilty of putting personalities before the priciples.
Has anyone else felt like this before? Surely it can't only be me who feels as if I'm shouting in the wind?
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#2
Hi Gerry, Funny that you have posted just as this time on this subject and I have been a member of GA in Australia for the past 10 years. Last night at my meeting this was exactly how I felt. Went into the meeting feeling really happy and come out feeling depressed! I talk a lot about my higher power or God as I see it. Before I got into GA I was seen as a 'hopeless' case and had virtually given up on myself also. So yes, I definately do believe in God! Something got me to that meeting 10 years ago and I have seen hundreds come and go in that time so guess I am the fortunate one. Last night someone shared about how they had busted but had 8 days clean - clap, clap then they never mentioned their gambling but rattled on about how they thought painting a fence was good therapy and how their mother who is 97 is ringing them and having delusions about dying!! Today I just had to say to myself that these people are still suffering and are still very sick (who am I to judge) but fortunately we have a very good chairperson who runs a tight ship so I will continue to keep going to MY meetings and take the good and leave the rest behind!
ps I think I am probably older than you (65)
Your friend in GA fellowship
Helen
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#3
Hi helen, thanks for the response. I know what you are saying about feeling grateful that you are not like that and using the phrase 'but for the grace of God go I' My major obstacle with this way of thinking is the fact that they posion others with their thinking and they keep people sick. Unfortunately the lack of a format means we dont have strong chairmaen/woman very often.

Thanks again for replying and ps I'm 26 so a young starter <!-- s:lol: --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_lol.gif" alt=":lol:" title="Laughing" /><!-- s:lol: -->
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