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Still keeping clean.
#1
Im Andy,a compulsive gambler and have now gone 142 days free of gambling.I dont know how I manage it some days as ive never replaced it really,I just scrape through each day,and my boredom levels have never been as hiogh as now.Im still bored with everything,bored of fighting each day,just to survive,I am very depressed as usual,dont seem to know any other way.I havent been to any GA meetings for over 6 weeks,not good I know,but Im so broke,I can barely put food on the table,and this is all WITHOUT gambling.Im never tempted at the moment because Im in so much financial mess from the damage I did 142 days ago,I couldnt even afford 1 slip,not that I ever could,but now I guess my head is straighter,but hell knows its so hard,I struggle every day and there is never a good day in my life.Im always broke,and always when I do ever get the luxury of having any money,its food or bills?And of course,bills always win.I never wanted things to be easy,just it would be nice if they were less hard,but never are.My name is Andy and I havent gambled today.
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#2
Hi Andy,
Glad to see you again. As long as you are not gambling today Andy things probably won't get worse just slowly better. The financial problems could take years to work out, but as long as you don't place that next bet they certainly won't get any worse.
Maybe you can talk with a financial councillor and try and work out a budget for you to live on. It's still great to see you here and hope that you keep coming back!
Cheers Helen
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#3
Andy,
Hey firstly would like to say 142 days well done thats fantastic. I am however going to air on the side of extreem caution with your post and offer some advice. You seem not to be following the programme as you havent attended a meeting for 6 weeks. In fact the only reason you are not betting at the moment is because your financial situation is so bad and that last bet and the subsequent damage is still fresh in your mind. What however happens if when your financial situation improves and it will due to the fact you are not betting you suddenly feel relaxed again and have your next big moment. I know from experience this is how it works so whilst your in this predicament financially you should draw strength from the fact others situations can be much worse and there are many not doing anything about there gambling situations.

Being in the meeting environment keeps you fresh of that, by listening to others plights and offering advice, this creates self belief and self worth again and therefor you can continue to improve life even if its very difficult.

You can say Im being overbearing and I would understand this as like it was for me 142 days is a massive achievement but your next bet and return to action is always just round the corner with this desease.

Meetings will make you feel positive that what you are doing is the best way to improve life and ensure you dont go back.

Good luck i hoep you listen.

B
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