28-03-2011, 11:28 PM
Daz,
Hey!! I hope you read this post and in this I am not going to try to add to your woes.
Wow compelling tale, it kind of brings hairs up on the back of my neck to say that I used to be like this, used to be in this situation every other month.
I posted the other week how I must have lost hundreds of wallets. Mine was the fruit machines and they are so inviting, they call you and once your into one of them you cannot stop until its all gone.
Daz, I want to tell you a bit about me so that I can in turn help you and please listen to what I say as it really is FOR YOU!! I am the man who after loosing all the money in my wallet, bank, etc stuck a sign on a machine went home got the HD TV and sold it for pittance just to try to get my money back, rational thinking???
I in fact always cried myself to sleep and NEVER had the intention to go back, after a quick fix solution to my problems ie borrowing the cash, I was always hiding from the friends I borrowed from, in fact I borrowed of everyone.
That was me, this is important, that was me.
First step one: to sit and look in the mirror at ourselves and our failings and to truly admit defeat over something we are powerless against, sounds simple eh? I sat down four years ago with no money in my pocket and said what do I have to show for my life, a broken relationship that was fuelled by empty prommises by me, broken family relationships, broken friendships, no possessions and for the first time in my life I was not scared.
I was not scared of admitting i had a problem, that I was a compulsive gambler, that I had a dreadfull desease that would continue to harm me unless I did something about it, then I remembered clearly GA.
four years on I and with one slight mishap in which I instantly realised the path I was taking and got out of it, to get strong again I have bought possessions, rebuilt friendships, rebuilt family ties, re-invented myself in a positive was and now I am taking a twelth step in helping you.
I dont know you, you could be anyone, but to me your are who I was.
Now I am going to tell you the steps YOU must take. Firstly admission: admit that if at this moment in time if you had cash the liklyhood is you would gamble, you may win, but ultimately you would loose.
Secondly a meeting, you may not understand GA, what it is and what it can do for you but it saved my life, it gave me understanding and a feeling of not being alone, it also gave me steps towards a new direction in life, a positive one.
You say you have no cash, so at the moment you are desperate, this is bad as if you borrow maybe you will forget the pain your in, I suggest not to do this.
First in admission you need to pick up the phone and say like I did many years ago " dad, I have a gambling problem and I am going to do something about it, I lost all my money, but I will go to GA and try a new way of life"
Dont ask your father for money just ask for him to take you to that meeting, once you go and believe me when I say you will be scared you will meet some likeminded people who have come together to share and help each other.
This will breed new positivity into your life and hopefully then you will take the steps to change your ways. I can sense in your thoughts you know for your daughter this is not good and I ure on the side of only thinking about one thing and one thing alone and that is waking up today and saying "no matter what, Just for today i will not gamble"
I know at this moment you will not look very far into the future and that was one of my biggest mistakes but when you do and you start to say to yourself everyday "just for today I will not gamble" the days become weeks, the weeks become months and suddenly you find yourself doing some things you never did before like buying some clothes for yourself, like buying some gifts for your daughter, like eating properly.
I never realised this but I was speaking with my father yesterday and we were talking about when I would get ill, most down to not eating properly (gambling) and now they see me and I have put on weight, i look healthy, I take this for granted in my road to recovery, but I have to keep telling myself its a LIFE illness.
Daz, dont blag your way out of this situation, I urge you to look at YOU and say, Im not that man, I can tell by your emotion that you dont wish to be, but some steps like HONESTY need to be taken.
Call the helpline and find a meeting, find GA and follw the path and it will give you the things you need.
I will leave you with one other thought! for many years I slept badly with lines of reels running through my head. I dont think to myself anymore "maybe I will win" Instead I think to myself "tonight I want to sleep well safe in the knowledge just for today I didnt gamble"
Go to a meeting Daz and be honest with those closest to you.
Barrie
Hey!! I hope you read this post and in this I am not going to try to add to your woes.
Wow compelling tale, it kind of brings hairs up on the back of my neck to say that I used to be like this, used to be in this situation every other month.
I posted the other week how I must have lost hundreds of wallets. Mine was the fruit machines and they are so inviting, they call you and once your into one of them you cannot stop until its all gone.
Daz, I want to tell you a bit about me so that I can in turn help you and please listen to what I say as it really is FOR YOU!! I am the man who after loosing all the money in my wallet, bank, etc stuck a sign on a machine went home got the HD TV and sold it for pittance just to try to get my money back, rational thinking???
I in fact always cried myself to sleep and NEVER had the intention to go back, after a quick fix solution to my problems ie borrowing the cash, I was always hiding from the friends I borrowed from, in fact I borrowed of everyone.
That was me, this is important, that was me.
First step one: to sit and look in the mirror at ourselves and our failings and to truly admit defeat over something we are powerless against, sounds simple eh? I sat down four years ago with no money in my pocket and said what do I have to show for my life, a broken relationship that was fuelled by empty prommises by me, broken family relationships, broken friendships, no possessions and for the first time in my life I was not scared.
I was not scared of admitting i had a problem, that I was a compulsive gambler, that I had a dreadfull desease that would continue to harm me unless I did something about it, then I remembered clearly GA.
four years on I and with one slight mishap in which I instantly realised the path I was taking and got out of it, to get strong again I have bought possessions, rebuilt friendships, rebuilt family ties, re-invented myself in a positive was and now I am taking a twelth step in helping you.
I dont know you, you could be anyone, but to me your are who I was.
Now I am going to tell you the steps YOU must take. Firstly admission: admit that if at this moment in time if you had cash the liklyhood is you would gamble, you may win, but ultimately you would loose.
Secondly a meeting, you may not understand GA, what it is and what it can do for you but it saved my life, it gave me understanding and a feeling of not being alone, it also gave me steps towards a new direction in life, a positive one.
You say you have no cash, so at the moment you are desperate, this is bad as if you borrow maybe you will forget the pain your in, I suggest not to do this.
First in admission you need to pick up the phone and say like I did many years ago " dad, I have a gambling problem and I am going to do something about it, I lost all my money, but I will go to GA and try a new way of life"
Dont ask your father for money just ask for him to take you to that meeting, once you go and believe me when I say you will be scared you will meet some likeminded people who have come together to share and help each other.
This will breed new positivity into your life and hopefully then you will take the steps to change your ways. I can sense in your thoughts you know for your daughter this is not good and I ure on the side of only thinking about one thing and one thing alone and that is waking up today and saying "no matter what, Just for today i will not gamble"
I know at this moment you will not look very far into the future and that was one of my biggest mistakes but when you do and you start to say to yourself everyday "just for today I will not gamble" the days become weeks, the weeks become months and suddenly you find yourself doing some things you never did before like buying some clothes for yourself, like buying some gifts for your daughter, like eating properly.
I never realised this but I was speaking with my father yesterday and we were talking about when I would get ill, most down to not eating properly (gambling) and now they see me and I have put on weight, i look healthy, I take this for granted in my road to recovery, but I have to keep telling myself its a LIFE illness.
Daz, dont blag your way out of this situation, I urge you to look at YOU and say, Im not that man, I can tell by your emotion that you dont wish to be, but some steps like HONESTY need to be taken.
Call the helpline and find a meeting, find GA and follw the path and it will give you the things you need.
I will leave you with one other thought! for many years I slept badly with lines of reels running through my head. I dont think to myself anymore "maybe I will win" Instead I think to myself "tonight I want to sleep well safe in the knowledge just for today I didnt gamble"
Go to a meeting Daz and be honest with those closest to you.
Barrie