My name is Andy and I am a compulsive gambler.I have not had a bet for 1 year today,since 23rd may 2010.I am pleased that I have managed to abstain for this length of time,but I know only too well,its just 1 bet away from disaster,so its just 1 day at a time.I said to myself this time last year if only I could stop gambling for 1 year,things would be so much better,I thought id be able to get out of debt if I worked hard,and didnt gamble,but it hasnt worked out that way.Debts have got higher,and I now wonder how I ever managed to gamble.But then again,things werent quite so dire a year ago in the world of business.But after some 25 years of gambling to have 1 full year off it feels strange.I dont miss it 1 bit,as I HATE GAMBLING.It has never done anything for me except bring pain,misery,loss,depression,debt,and hundreds of other bad things as well as rob me of my youthful days,relationships,and my personality.Part of me is lost forever to the disease and will never return,but all I can hope is that I continue along the corrrect path,which is definately away from any form of gambling and stay clean.But just for today,I will not gamble.Andy.
Fantastic Andy and congratulations on your one year in recover.
Your post sounds so much more positive than it did a year ago or e ven 6 months ago so your life has improved.
Gambling also took so much away from me and like you I just recover one day at a time. I know that sometimes things look bleak but I also know what would happen if I went back to gamble.
Andy, I am proud of you and we do this GA journey together.
If you are feeling down, lonely, alone come here and talk, we will be here to listen.
Kindest regards
Helen
Listen mate, you should feel really proud of yourself.
If i can go a year without gambling i will be sooooo pleased. This addiction of mine is so evil that once its over i'm even going to propose to my girlfriend. I think of the money, I could spend and feel sick. I have lost so much and feel so low at times. My girlfriend dose'nt know, I cant bare to tell her! She still wants to go on expensive holidays as she is unaware. This means I have to go with her, but it takes even longer to pay my debt off. I think its the debt that hurts me the most and this debt is the effect of betting again. Its like i feel like because i have lost a certain amount, i have the devine right to win it back!! And its this spiral effect.
But today is 23/May/2011 and it will be a significant one, because i'm done with gambling. That is it me gone. Everytime i feel sad or low, or feel the urge to bet online, I will visit this forum and help someone else, but it turn its helping myself.
What i want you to know right now is that however you feel about gambling and however big the urge is. Just think about what you have achieved and how happy you are now! Way up the positives and negatives.
I feel with gambling the reason why we do it at times is off the cuff, we dont stop and think and the concequences if we lose!!!
Thank you very much for all your words of hope Helen,Dave and everybody who has helped me get to this year without a bet.I am grateful to GA for getting through these hard and difficult days.I do hope it will get less hard as I dont believe it will get easier,just less hard.Many thanks,Andy.
