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Not all that he is
#1
He is a compulsive gambler.

But that is not all he is, he is also

A loving partner
A fantastic Father to 3 amazing children
Kind, loving, funny and warm
Mostly thoughtful and caring
Hardworking and decent
And many more things

Most of all he is my best friend.

This is why I choose to stick by him and try to help him recover from this sad illness that destroys too many lives.

He has been fighting his addiction for too long and always ends up defeated. Today he is attending his first GA Meeting and rather than being sad that it has come to this, I am proud that he has grown into a man who has the strength to admit he has a problem and is taking the right steps to change his life. I know he is not going to find it easy to walk into a room full of strangers and tell them he has a problem, it was hard enough admitting it to himself and the person who loves him the most so for that courage I admire him.

I believe he can do this, he needs to believe it too.

For all of those of you out there who are affected by a loved one gambling. Find the strength in yourself to find what is good in your loved one, hold on to that and don't let anyone make you feel like a mug for standing by them.

You know who you are.

Good Luck and remember we love you!
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#2
Thank you Mrs rabbit,

For those who are reading this I am the gambler (mr rabbit) of this relationship. Not only has my wife managed to make me cry with what she has wrote but also I think this is a brilliant statement not just for me but for everyone out there. To know that if you are the gambler that is not all you are or all you can be. It took me a while to see that but I have, and I am on the mend. I hope what has been written here will help many others as it has me.

My name is Dave and I am a compulsive gambler.
Last bet 18th july 2011.
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#3
Hi daisy chain,

Believe me I when I say that I too have been at the end of my tether and every time a relapse occurs, I find myself distancing myself from him. I put up emotional walls to try and protect myself from it all. It has taken me a while to realise that with a negative attitude and destructive angry words aimed at him I will only make the situation worse and further lower his already fragile self esteem. Instead I now try and find the strength to look for something positive to say. It is a long hard journey for everyone involved not just for the gambler. I too have tried to adapt to the one day at a time method. Just for today I am going to be strong and help him to recover. Just for day I am not going to be negative about the situation. It is a lot easier than thinking along the lines of "Is it always going to be this hard and how many more times is he going to put us through this."

I'm glad my words helped, as I was writing them it was aimed at him, but also, as I was writing it I realised that it might help others too and I'm glad that it has made even just one person stop and think.

Good luck and I hope you both too get through it.
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#4
Hi,

I am the partner of a gambler,

I have been with my partner only 5 months, he has recently opened up to me about the seriousness of his gambling addiction, small things have come out over the past few months but never the full extent of his illness.

Many times i have wanted to run for the hills and out of his situation.
But as is your husband my partner also is a very loving, caring affectionate person, and i have decided i will stick by him no matter what because without me he has no support as all his family have disowned him due to his actions all stemming back to his illness.
He is 27 and suffered with this from being 17 and becoming a professional footballer he lost all that 4 years into his career all due to gambling.

I am very touched by your post and shed a few tears because we have had alot of heartache over his illness and your post gives me hope!

I feel i am gibbering on a little but this is alot to take in an all new to me an i have felt unsure of where to turn and i have found myself on this forum.
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