09-08-2011, 09:03 AM
John,
You seem a very intelligent man, a rational person who can digress the error and symptoms.
I to am quite a clever person in so much as I understand the physical and mental signs that I am empowered to gamble. This said there is only one path that will ensure we never forget the depths we go to gamble.
Many years ago my car was on tick I was renting a room with a guy and I remember rushing home unplugging the expensive TV I had got on credit and rushing to cash converters to get a small amount for it just to try to win money back I had lost.
That was not the only story from my gambling days I was a complete and utter mug.
I was so into gambling that no one could ever tell me anything, everything was someone elses fault never my own and yet I continued digging the hole deeper and deeper.
I wrote an interesting post one day about how to re-build life, I call it total re-programming it is surely about character change from head to toe.
I think in reality I have gone past the urges to gamble, I only think today I did not gamble. I remember very clearly in my recovery one night laid in asleep awaking with all hot and burning up, I had a nightmare that was so real about "being in action" but that was then.
Now I cannot remember the nights I dont sleep well, I always sleep sound. I dont live in a room anymore, i own things, actual things, I am methodical, practical and although I carry many of the traits of my past I dont let gambling come in the way of my future.
As a very intelligent man you should cut the credit cards up, talk with the banks and freeze the payments, get any job you can and open things up with your mum.
Then start living one day at a time whilst still remmebering the past that went before...
God granted me the serenity, I hope he does you also
Take Care
Ba
You seem a very intelligent man, a rational person who can digress the error and symptoms.
I to am quite a clever person in so much as I understand the physical and mental signs that I am empowered to gamble. This said there is only one path that will ensure we never forget the depths we go to gamble.
Many years ago my car was on tick I was renting a room with a guy and I remember rushing home unplugging the expensive TV I had got on credit and rushing to cash converters to get a small amount for it just to try to win money back I had lost.
That was not the only story from my gambling days I was a complete and utter mug.
I was so into gambling that no one could ever tell me anything, everything was someone elses fault never my own and yet I continued digging the hole deeper and deeper.
I wrote an interesting post one day about how to re-build life, I call it total re-programming it is surely about character change from head to toe.
I think in reality I have gone past the urges to gamble, I only think today I did not gamble. I remember very clearly in my recovery one night laid in asleep awaking with all hot and burning up, I had a nightmare that was so real about "being in action" but that was then.
Now I cannot remember the nights I dont sleep well, I always sleep sound. I dont live in a room anymore, i own things, actual things, I am methodical, practical and although I carry many of the traits of my past I dont let gambling come in the way of my future.
As a very intelligent man you should cut the credit cards up, talk with the banks and freeze the payments, get any job you can and open things up with your mum.
Then start living one day at a time whilst still remmebering the past that went before...
God granted me the serenity, I hope he does you also
Take Care
Ba