20-11-2011, 08:03 PM
Started my Xmas shopping this week and, like most others, began to wonder how I would be able to afford all the things I need to buy. Bad thoughts crept into my mind about how nice it would be to win some money. Instantly, I began to smile because in a bizarre way I enjoy those moments when the devil inside me attempts to return me to the dark days. It reminds me that my recovery will last forever. If I read that last sentence when I first came to this site it would have scared me to death. I thought then that I just had to stop gambling for a little while. The truth is I like the fact that I am in this for the long haul. It is an extremely small price to pay for the happiness and peace I have encountered over the last three months. Not gambling has not had one single negative affect on my life. There is only positive gains to be had from not gambling. I looked at the transactions of the past three months on my personal bank account the other day and it barely fills a page. A short while ago I would have had more movement in my account in one week. My local branch could probably pay someone off due to the time saved on my account.