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Abstaining or Recovery ???
#11
bump....
Meetings help, but meetings are only a small part to how GA works....

GA is a 12 step organisation that offers the program that keeps me in recovery...

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#12
For me the word recovery means healing.
For me abstaining only means that I have stopped causing myself self abuse and pains.
Once I abstained from all unhealthy habits I was able to exchange unhealthy habits in to healthy habits. 
The wording I want to be normal is not very healthy.
Until I admitted to myself that my unhealthy reactions to people life and situations was an indicator that my hurt inner child was not healed.
Before my recovery I use to bury and suppress my feelings and my emotions.
The recovery program was a manual to finding a healthy life.
Untill I got my ass in to gear and put time and effort in my recovery I was going to remain reacting in such unhealthy ways.
My making a decision was setting a boundary to live a healthy life.
The recovery program was not about who is right wrong, or not about who is good or bad, it is all about me  becoming healthy.
No one could do it for me.
Untill I admitted to myself what was healthy or unhealthy I could not change.
Every pain in my life caused fears I did not understand.
The recovery program was about putting much time and effort in to my recovery.
To become motivated in so many heaalthy ways.
I am a non religious person.
Yet over time I gained faith and hope in myself.
If I am trully  an equal to all people in the recovery program then if any one is able to achive success so can I.
Love and peace to every one.

Dave L

AKA Dave of Beckenham
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#13
Cheers for that that Dave,

To be healthily emotionally disconnected from all feelings towards addictions and obsessions takes time..

can relate to that...

Recovery is a journey not a destination.

I was meeting up with a friend from one the fellowships for a coffee each week but due to work commitment that has stopped. Slow progress is still progress..Smile no sponsor here as yet but keeping up the meetings in both fellowships at least two or three meetings a week here spread between them.

Peace n Love to all xx

Iain
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#14
(17-02-2020, 09:02 PM)recoveringlad Wrote: Cheers for that that Dave,

To be healthily emotionally disconnected from all feelings towards addictions and obsessions takes time..

can relate to that...

Recovery is a journey not a destination.  

I was meeting up with a friend from one the fellowships for a coffee each week but due to work commitment that has stopped.  Slow progress is still progress..Smile  no sponsor here as yet but keeping up the meetings in both fellowships at least two or three meetings a week here spread between them.  

Peace n Love to all xx

Iain
Hi

For me recovery is a journey to healing my hurt inner child.

Yet it was important to over come my fears of trying.

I use to give up and hope in myself.

Every new skill I try is worth while for the learning of healthier ways in my life today.

I needed to also learn to be more patient and tolerant in myself.

Thank you for your feed back.

Dave L
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#15
bump...
Meetings help, but meetings are only a small part to how GA works....

GA is a 12 step organisation that offers the program that keeps me in recovery...

Reply
#16
Hi

What is the difference between Abstaining or Recovery.

Abstaining is only stopping being consumed with unhealthy habits for short term.

Recovery only happens when you abstain from unhealthy habits.

My recovery is based up on giving up unhealthy habits and replacing them with  healthy habits.

For me my recovery was about healing the hurt child with in me.

Every unhealthy reaction in anger told me that my inner child was not healed.

Every unhealthy reaction in intolerance and impatience told me that my inner child was not healed and that I was hard on myself.

Every unhealthy lie I told told me told me that my inner child was still living in fears I did not understand.

I did not know that my own conscience was based up on spiritual values.

When I went against my own conscience I was in effect hurting myself and people around me.

I am not a quick learner for sure, I have in recovery since 1969 which is over 50 years.

Yet I have only been clean for about twenty eight years, yet what do I know.

Yet once I abstained from unhealthy habits my journey just started then.

We encourage people to keep going to meetings, because at some time we get to understand that the addictions and the obsessions were just the symptoms were just the indicators that not all was well in me.

How can we encourage people to come out of them self, how can we encourage people to invest more time and energy in to them self.

No one could stop me gambling that was going to be my own conscience decision.

My own conscience decision was to no longer hurt myself or hurt other people.

I use to justify being cruel to myself and other people.

I use to justify being cruel to other people in saying to myself I wanted justice, that was not true, I wanted vengeance because I wanted to transfer all my pains fears and frustrations on to other people.

When I wanted vengeance that indicated that my pains were not healed, that indicated that my fears were not faced, that also indicated that my frustrations were high in me because I had not fully accepted the serenity prayer.

I was then and am today a non religious person and questioned if I could have a healthy life doing in it without religion.

Yes for sure my recovery is a result of staying in the recovery no one can make me do it, no one could stop me gambling that had to be my own choice.

The reason I do not gamble today is because I am emotionally detached from gambling, I do not hate gambling, I do not have a problem if other people gamble, I do not think gambling will give me any thing healthy in any way.

Gambling was a way of me escaping how I felt, gambling was a way of me not dealing with my feelings and my emotions.

The longer I gambled the longer it would take me to heal my hurt inner child.

Sadly once people have abstained from unhealthy habits they get to think that they are no longer emotional vulnerable, they even get to lie to them self that they will never ever gamble for the rest of their life.

Do they think that they can control their gambling, do they think that they have healed their hurt inner child, do they think that they no longer need to interact and learn with other people.

The recovery program helps us stop disconnecting and isolating ourselves from other people.

Every time a person is honest in a meeting and admits that they have gambled is a sign of strength.

Every time a person is honest in a meeting and admits that they have being lying is a sign of strength.

Every time a person is honest in a meeting and gives a in depth therapy of painful child hood is a sign of strength.

So is abstaining only on its own enough for me today, not at all.

I could only heal my hurt inner child when I would ackowledge the pains and fears I was still living in.

Love and peace to every one.

Dave L

AKA Dave of Beckenham
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