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I am here at Basildon ready for 50th Birthday Anniversary
My Name is Dave of Beckenham. I am becoming healthier in a spiritual way. Yet I am not a religious person.

I left Lingfield last night feeling good after attending meeting.

I had list of instructions how to get to Basildon Essex and got lost, yet arrived at hotel just after midnight.

Went to bed about 2 am and woke up 6am and was reallxed and ready to go.

Breakfast at 8am Swimming at 9am now ready to attend GA 50th Birthday in the UK.

Is me being here about money or wasting time or even being bored no I am here for very selfish reasons I want to be far more healthy.

Am I willing to listen to all peoples sharing and an explanation of their recovery.

There are often times when people are not willing or able to healthy advice.

Even though I am in a completely strange location in a place I have never been before I am able to be mysef with feeling nervous or uncomfortable.

I do not need to drink alchol to be myself.

Loneliness was one of my emotional triigers and also not feeling worthy of feeling proud or good about myself.

As I lose body weight I am having more energy and feel much more psotive about myself.

Healthy action and healthy words generate pride and self worth in myself.

The wording escape was often used in the spirtual recovery program.

Once understanding wording escape was an indicator of deep feaar based issues.

In making lists on regular basis out of ten how much emoitonal pain am I living in today.

Out of ten how much fear am I living in today.

Out of ten how much frustration am I living in today.

Out of ten how much frustration am I living in today.

Out of ten how lonely and isolated am I feeling today.

Out of ten how bored am I feeling today.

In comparing those feeling as to how I use to feel where do I need to work on today to improve how I feel in myself.

Am I nurturing and encouraging towards myself today.

This morning there is no test of my steel I am at a very stable state of mind and feel very comfortable with in myself.

No matter when people had their last bet that is not important in GA every person has some thing to give me about their expereinces.

Even though I had no money the meetings told me they wantd to see me there with out any money.

GA is like a second family to me, the expereinces the humor the healty banter there were time I laughed in meetings when I felt I was not able to laugh.

The days here have been very full, very productive, now I take spirtual recovery seriously today.

I was not selfish on walking in the spirtual recovery program, I was how ever very self destructive which is completely different.

I have been in recovery since 1969, during those years in recovery I know that the spirtual recovery program works.

More healthy interactions than unhealthy reactions to life and people.

My anger use to be an unhealthy reaction to my pains I could not heal, to my fears I was able to face, my frustrations due to my unreasonable expectation of life and people.

Life being unmanagable step one was all due to my emotonal triggers to my feelings of pains I could not heal, to my feelings of fears I was able to face, my feelings of frustrations due to my unreasonable expectation of life and people, my feelings of loneliness and my feelings of boredom.

I use to take the easy opton in so many ways, in the old days the only way I felt sucessful was by winning money or getting easy money.

Today I feel sucessful today due to my productive healthy actions and I feel sucessful today due to my healthy words and healthy interactions with other people.

My gratitude is an indicator of how much my values have changed today, my gratitude is an indicator of how many spiritual values are in my life today.

On walking in the spiritual recovery I did not understand how unhealthy I was, today I am maturing and growing in so many ways,

Understanding that my reaction to life and other people is my responsibility, it took me over 23 years to grasp an understanding life being unmanageable was due to my emotional triggers.

My unhealthy reaction to life and other people is about life being unmanageable due to my pains my fears my frustrations my loneliness and my boredom.

If I remained feeling like a victim tells me I am not healing my pains in a healthy way, if I am being resentful I am not healing my pains in a healthy way, if I am taking other peoples unhealthy actions and words personally I am not healing my pains in a healthy way.

Understanding panic was due to the high levels of fear I was living in for a large part of my life.

Panic caused me to do or say unhealthy things, panic caused me to doubt myself and every one else, panic was due to the fact I felt like I was out of control in my life.

My sulking was due to my expectations and an indicator that I had not matured and grown up.

My sulking was an indicator that I was not happy with the way things were going.

My sulking was an indicator that I was not accepting the limitations of life or other people and that my expectations were unreasonable about other people and life.

There are not enough hours in the day for me these days.

Having lists of things to do helps me stay very focused on today.

Fear caused me to doubt myself and fear caused me to doubt people around me.

As I cross things off my want and need to do list I am building the confidence in myself, as I cross things off my want and need to do list I am improving the pride I have in myself.

Each healthy action I do is saying that I value myself today.

Just for today I will is about me setting my mind to do things that are healthy for me and people around me.

Setting boundaries is about how much I value myself today.

I am looking forward to the 50th Celebration of GA in the UK at Basildon Essex.

I did not have a clue how important the spiritual recovery program was going to have on me.

I walked in to the recovery program emotionally traumatized, not able to see any thing clearly.

My questions were due to my insecurity I had learned to live my life on the edge of my nerves.

With each lie came more fear, in time I was able to get honest with myself.

No matter when a person had their last bet, I am an equal to them.

I am able to be far more accountable to myself today.

I understand most aspects of the spiritual recovery program.

My motives for doing things are not resentful, I do things willingly.

I am not torn a part with rage and anger, I am content with myself today.

I was not stupid bad or evil, I was just a very weak vulnerable unhealthy person.

I am doing well and trying to have full healthy productive days yet while respecting my physical limits.

I do not want or need to gamble today.

The obsessions and addictions were an indicator that I had poor resolve in how I felt with in myself.

Fear was a way of me protecting myself

I no longer want to live in fear any more.

I do not fear the gambling establishments today.

I use to say that I wanted to be normal.

Today I want to be healthier than normal.

Love and peace to everyone.

Dave Of Beckenham
Any news on the various workshops Dave? Anything you've learnt?
In unity
Smartie xx
That spiritual recovery and healing from the pains of our past is more important than ever before in my life. Thank you for asking. The tears and pains of our past were shown in so many ways. One GA person after hearing me share said that his partner wanted to express her self to me. That was very powerful and yet had happened once before long ago. The conference was a success in every way. One big family of honesty.

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