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Telling family about CG and GA
I nearly had a huge step forward today but chickened out although the door was open for it. 

One thing I've not done yet is told any of my family except my brother that I'm a CG. This afternoon I had some time with my mum on her own. We had been talking about money as she was worried I was going to ask her for a loan to get emergency car repairs done and as mum and dad have just come back from holiday they are understandably skint. In the conversation I said that I know the feeling as I'm really strapped for cash myself at the moment and have been for a few months, which she knows anyway because she has seen me being very careful with my money to make sure that my bills get paid. 

I had the opportunity as it would have been a good time to slot it into conversation to tell her that I'm a CG, especially as it is just hours away from being a month since my last bet - something I can't quite believe myself and keep having to pinch myself to make sure I'm not dreaming! 

I chickened out of saying anything though although I was thinking about it even before the subject of money came up because I knew I had her on her own for a bit. I think it was partly because I just don't know how to tell her and partly because I very much doubt she will be able to even vaguely understand. The other reason I'm hesitant to say anything though is a lot more emotionally charged. 

Over the last few years, maybe getting on for 10 or so now tbh, I've taken my family on a real rollercoaster ride with trying to deal with me as I've gone through multiple breakdowns, failed relationships, bankruptcy, suicide attempts, police warnings, and all the major turmoil that goes with each and every one of those things. I've literally taken them to hell and back and I've spent the last year or two trying to rebuild a pretty broken relationship, especially with my parents. Despite my gambling the relationship has got a lot better and I'm therefore very reluctant to do or say anything that might jepordise the progress that has been made. 

I really don't know what to do, but I wish I could say something. They already know that I go to a "self help" group as I had to explain why I had to leave their house earlier than I normally would after going shopping. It was the first thing that jumped into my head and I have just gone with that since I mentioned it. I feel terrible about lying about where I am going even though it's more an omission than an untruth but I just don't know how to say that I'm going to my meeting without causing more pain to them. 

I'm going to bring this up at my meeting soon, maybe at my next one, but it's eating away at me as I know it will be a big step forward for me when I finally tell them, but I just don't know how to and unless I have an idea of what I'm going to say when I do tell them I'm going to chicken out every time even if like today I had the opportunity. Of course, like pretty much everything big, I'll probably tell just mum and then she will tell dad when she gets it sorted out in her head. It's always been that way simply because she is a lot easier to talk to than dad - unless it is something practical in which case I talk to dad not mum. 

I know this is different to telling your partner, and as I don't live with my parents it complicates things more as they don't see the things that go on when I'm not with them, but if anyone has any advice as to how I might be able to tell them I would appreciate it. I don't think mum has ever gambled in her life apart from a weekly lottery ticket. I know my dad got hooked on scratchcards for a while and mum had to get him to stop as he was burning a lot of money on them, but even then he stopped by himself and since other than a lottery ticket doesn't gamble any more. 

Thanks in advance for any advice you can give, or sharing how you told your family. 


(PS Sorry mods - it's another long one. I just can't get them shorter when I start explaining things. I'll keep trying to get my posts shorter though!)

Messages In This Thread
Telling family about CG and GA - by Rmllbzd - 07-10-2011, 04:05 AM
Re: Telling family about CG and GA - by Poster David - 11-10-2011, 12:51 PM
Re: Telling family about CG and GA - by Rmllbzd - 11-10-2011, 07:58 PM
Re: Telling family about CG and GA - by barrieexgambler - 12-10-2011, 01:32 AM
Re: Telling family about CG and GA - by Rmllbzd - 13-10-2011, 02:37 AM

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