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Latest Threads
Today is day 1!
Forum: Share Section
Last Post: Dazza85
23-05-2019, 07:07 PM
» Replies: 0
» Views: 30
1 year medallion
Forum: Share Section
Last Post: Chris_b
20-05-2019, 10:00 AM
» Replies: 8
» Views: 287
Do I live with a gambler?
Forum: Share Section
Last Post: Chris_b
14-05-2019, 10:40 AM
» Replies: 10
» Views: 1,890
Last bet
Forum: Share Section
Last Post: shoebox
11-05-2019, 11:55 AM
» Replies: 3
» Views: 152
Check in & Declarations
Forum: Share Section
Last Post: Toby hope
04-05-2019, 09:05 PM
» Replies: 115
» Views: 38,794
Simmo's Journal
Forum: Share Section
Last Post: Simmo
30-04-2019, 03:38 PM
» Replies: 71
» Views: 25,117
At it Again, Time For Cha...
Forum: Share Section
Last Post: Itsgrimupnorth
24-04-2019, 08:20 PM
» Replies: 6
» Views: 1,021
Four places a compulsive ...
Forum: Share Section
Last Post: Chris_b
19-04-2019, 12:06 PM
» Replies: 0
» Views: 142
My daily diary
Forum: Share Section
Last Post: Adam9999
09-04-2019, 09:33 PM
» Replies: 88
» Views: 12,656
vulnerable people and gam...
Forum: Gamblers Anonymous Q & A Section
Last Post: Toby hope
30-03-2019, 07:29 PM
» Replies: 9
» Views: 6,250

 
  Today is day 1!
Posted by: Dazza85 - 23-05-2019, 07:07 PM - Forum: Share Section - No Replies

Today is day 1. The day I realise, I'm a compulsive and addicted gambler.  I've lied to myself since the age of 18, I'm 33 now.  I've always 'liked a bet'.  Football, horses, three card poker being my top 3!

Dont get me wrong, I always prioritise my bill's.. but my gambling is secretive, nobody knows, just me.. I have a 4 year old daughter and a fiance, they deserve better. 

Things got worse for me 2 months ago. I paid x and joined a WhatsApp subscription group, every day 'tips' - horses, football and greyhounds. For 2 months I've followed the tips religiously, losing and staking again and again ready for the win.  That's half the problem, my first day on the group I won x, chased that every day since. The group leader would say things like 'bad day today guys, it will improve'.  I found myself using credit cards to suddenly keep up the stakes every day.  

Today is day 1, I'm x in debt now, today I blew x in one go, like it doesn't even matter. I go on holiday next week, that money would of come in handy for my family ! I'm a dickhead, I'm ashamed of myself. 

I'm here, I intend to log my journey.. day 1 I've just paid £9.99 and installed Gamban on my phone - the only real source of my gambling. 

I need to get out of this, no more gambling for me!

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  Last bet
Posted by: Toby hope - 04-05-2019, 09:46 PM - Forum: Share Section - Replies (3)

Today i gambled and lost.  I cannot take it anymore.  I am at the end of my tether.  Toby.

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  1 year medallion
Posted by: Itsgrimupnorth - 24-04-2019, 07:16 PM - Forum: Share Section - Replies (8)

It's coming up to my year anniversary of abstainance, unfortunately due to circumstances outside my control with family illness and work/re-training commitments  I have only been able to make it to 19 meetings and by the time my year comes round it will only be 21 meetings. Is there any way I would be able to get a medallion? I just want it to mark the occasion and to keep reminding me how far I've come.

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  Four places a compulsive gambler could end up.
Posted by: Chris_b - 19-04-2019, 12:06 PM - Forum: Share Section - No Replies

This is a little tale of warning for all compulsive gamblers which I heard on YouTube but have subsequently shared in a meeting.
They say there are four places a compulsive gambler can end up. 
The first is homeless. Imagine gambling getting so bad, you constantly borrow money to get you through another month after you've gambled away your wages, paying back previous debts just to borrow more which eventually you just gamble anyway. At some point in time there is no more money and a landlord won't be a charity for long even if your excuses sound genuine. Family and friends eventually get fed up and unfortunately some of us become homeless. It's a huge challenge to get yourself back.

The second is in prison. Sometimes the need to gamble is so strong that some of us will resort to illegal activities to continue our gambling. We might kid ourselves we are borrowing money that we'll win with and replace what we've borrowed but that's not how it works. It might work once or twice but soon that access to someone else's money becomes standard so the risk becomes greater and eventually we will lose it all. We might steal something to sell to continue our gambling or we might come up with a scam to get money to continue our gambling. Eventually, when there is nowhere left to turn, no one to bail us out, nowhere to run, we face the consequences of our actions. Because most gambling thefts tend to involve money and we have access to someone's money, any criminal act generally involves a breach of trust making a prison sentence more likely. Even if your first conviction is suspended, if it becomes public it can hinder getting a job, or you might have to take any job, not necessarily the job you would choose. Do it again and you're definitely going inside. All of a sudden, because of an addiction, you're in a cell with someone else who could be in for any reason, told what to do every minute of the day. If you have any friends or family left you can only see them at set times a limited number of times a month for a limited amount of time. Try getting a decent job after going into prison. Employers worry about their reputation and can you be trusted? You might believe you can at that moment but remember that addiction is always waiting, always looking for an angle to get you back at it. Not having a job means little money, little hope. Depression can kick in. It's a huge task to come back from that, just because of gambling.

The third follows on from the first two places, homelessness and prison. The third place you could end up at because of gambling is dead. You could take your own life. A lot of people have, generally men, with debts and secrets, or depression and hopelessness. Imagine a life which was perfect for you, taken away. Imagine having debtors phoning every day, texting, emailing. Imagine a family gone because you put them at risk because of gambling. Imagine that dream career out of reach because of things you've done because of gambling. Imagine applying for jobs and having to disclose your shameful past, never getting a reply, let alone an interview, because employers don't like to say no, they'd rather say nothing. Imagine how depressed you become when you can't see a future. You might turn to drink, drugs, crime, anything to dull the thoughts. Think how your mind feels if you are still gambling, wanting to stop but not being able to. For some the only way out is suicide, just because of gambling.

The fourth place a compulsive gambler could end up is a Gambler's Anonymous meeting. Most people have to be ready to stop, but if you are or if you're not, compared to the other three places available to a compulsive gambler, this is the only place that gives you hope and a chance of a normal life. It's not a cure, it's a proven way of abstaining from an insidious addiction that will and has taken everything from that unfortunate addict. To the outsider it must seem incredible that anyone would waste good money on the press of a button or turn of a card, let alone throw away jobs, family, friends, even life, purely because of gambling, but the addiction is so powerful and doesn't discriminate. Rich or poor, clever or not, successful or not, young or old, left without interference it will take everything.
Gambler's anonymous is a group of people from all backgrounds that meet to give each other hope and give advice through experience to abstain from gambling, and if you are lucky enough to find a meeting embrace it. It's free. There will be someone there who has experienced what you have. Someone who has felt how you feel. Someone who has come back from where you are. Someone just like you who no longer gambles and has a life now. Ultimately isn't that what we all want, a normal life that the majority have. A job, a family, a future, a choice? GA will give you that. You have to work at it to. Attend a meeting regularly, share how you feel, help others with your story, remember what brought you to the meeting in the first place, live honestly, change your way of thinking. Quite a small price to pay for normal life. 
If it's not for you the option to carry on gambling is always there, that voice in your head always telling you it's not that bad but think which of the four endings you might meet next?

Told through experience.

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  Abstaining isn't enough
Posted by: Chris_b - 20-03-2019, 06:33 PM - Forum: Share Section - Replies (2)

If nothing changes then nothing changes. If you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always got. These are just two examples of sayings that a lot of compulsive gamblers should be able to identify with. 
It is quite a simple formula for abstaining from gambling. Attend a meeting regularly, give over your money, don't visit gambling establishments, physical or virtual, be accountable to another person for your time. Do those things and you should stay off gambling.BUT, what happens when you are faced with a situation that might take you back to gambling to escape dealing with it? It could be stress at work, money issues, sometimes just the fact it's raining! Our addiction will find any way to get you back at it.

Long term recovery, not just abstinence, comes from change within. Looking at ourselves, finding our triggers, getting rid of as much fuel for the flame of addiction as possible.
Now this isn't easy as it means admitting we have flaws much deeper than just gambling, but it is worth the work if it helps keep addiction at bay, at the same time helping us become better people.
If you are able to attend a Steps meeting or group I would recommend it. It might be a meeting with a counsellor but in my experience it helps if someone has experienced what you're talking about.


So that's my post. If all you do is attend meetings, what happens when you stop attending? My experience was I relapsed. I hope you're different but if you're like me, give a change program a go.

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  Requirements for using the hall
Posted by: scorp_io_32 - 07-03-2019, 04:48 PM - Forum: Gamblers Anonymous Q & A Section - Replies (2)

Hi there

Recently I have received an email making some requests for the continued use of the hall for GA meetings.

1. The name of a trained first-aider
2. and Fire Marshall
3. Public Liability insurance certificate

Given that we are an anonymous organisation how do I provide names for 1 and 2
Does the organisation have insurance that covers us or will we need to get our own?

We are a very small group that doesn't get much support from the organisation but struggles on.

Apologies if this is the wrong place for this post.

Thanks

Chaz

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  Heartbreak
Posted by: Ange - 12-02-2019, 11:00 PM - Forum: Share Section - Replies (6)

Hi my husband is a recovering compulsive gambler who has walked out on me, he left me and will not talk to me, he is acting like he hates me! I was going to the family group at gam anon and I thought our life was probably going to be in the best place it had ever been and it really was getting better he was doing so well, after all the years the gambling had nearly destroyed us! Well I am heartbroken because now he is in recovery which is brilliant but I do not understand why this has happened I know that he used to say that every time something good happened he seemed to destruct but I just don’t know because I read about people who come through recovery but has anyone any experience of this happening during recovery, I am heartbroken and confused and still suffering and trying to navigate through what has happened as well as recover myself still from the years the effect of his illness has had on me! I feel like I really believed in him when nobody else did not even himself, stood by him through so much and now he has thrown me away without any explanation!!

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  Hi My Names Ty
Posted by: Tyger79 - 01-02-2019, 05:53 PM - Forum: Share Section - Replies (1)

Hi my names TY hopefully today was the last time that i gamble
How many times have i said that?
Undecided

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  Helo
Posted by: Boogle - 29-01-2019, 02:22 AM - Forum: Share Section - Replies (1)

Hi

I am new to this site. I have become addicted to online casinos, I have blown so much money I feel sick about it.

I need to stop I know that but I just don’t know how. I start every day saying I won’t gamble but by lunch time I find myself itching to get home and get online.


Help please

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  Isn't compulsive gambling basically a financial problem?
Posted by: shoebox - 23-01-2019, 07:34 AM - Forum: Gamblers Anonymous Q & A Section - No Replies

No, compulsive gambling seems to be an emotional problem. When in the grip of this illness, we create mountains of apparently insoluble problems. Of course, there are financial problems, but we also have to face family problems, employment problems, or problems involving ourselves with the law. We lose our friends and relatives have us on their personal blacklist.

Of the many serious problems we create, the financial problems seem the easiest to solve.

Upon entering GA and stopping gambling, we find income often increases and, as there is no longer the financial drain caused by gambling, there is soon relief from the financial pressures.

The most difficult task to be faced is that of bringing about a personality change from within ourselves. Most of us in GA look upon this as our greatest challenge and believe to be a lifetime job.

Extract from the "Questions and Answers about the problem of compulsive gambling and the GA recovery program" (Orange book) page 15.

Available from this website as a free download in the Literature section.

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