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The Journey Begins
#14
8 days on from my last journal update and made it to 96 days complete. feeling good, strong and positive.

Early days, and a decent PPI payout has made a huge difference to my finances, but whereas before I would have blown the cash on gambling, I've managed to stay strong, pay off credit cards (and close the accounts), and have a little bit to treat myself with.

We have put some of the funds into a new camera, and I can't wait to be snapping away creating happy family memories. This upcoming holiday will be the first where it's actually paid for before I go and not sat on some credit card gathering interest.

I'm sorry for posting up this, as I realise the route out of the big hole is a long and hard one, it is for me too, and whilst I've had this payout and help, I have at least 4 years of payments ahead of me to repay my parents who have helped clear the remaining credit cards completely.

What I was hoping to show, and I've not been too eloquent in explaining, is that by being wholly open with my family, committing to the GA program and showing my family that by going to every meeting that I can, and by handing over cash responsibility to my wife that I am able to change. My family have rallied around and helped me in a monetary way, and in a spiritual way with reassurance and the promise that I can call any of them anytime of any day and that they will be there for me should I get a wobble on.

It's been 5 weeks or so, since I had a wobble, and I was so grateful to be able to call and be open, it got me through what was but a moment in time where I could so easily have gone on a different path.

I would urge any reader, to pick a select few close family or friends, and fully open up to them. Not only is it liberating, but they will then be able to help you stay strong.

So what else has happened.....well.....I have widened the circle of people who know I have this problem, and I have told a few of my closest friends. None of them knew, all were shocked, but surprisingly (why was I surprised? I have great friends), all were incredibly supportive and will have my back should I be drawn to a fruit machine in a pub, or clamouring for a casino on a weekend away. I feel grateful for this additional layer of armour.

Will hit 101 days on my next GA meeting, I can't wait to share it with the guys, as for me it signifies a lasting commitment and big achievement. I hope to still be here posting away when I reach years of abstinence.

I've started to become a bit more active on the online chat room, I hope to help a few of you, especially those in the early days of recovery as it's still very real for me. There are already good experiences that are worth sharing, not as advice as such, but as personal opinions and how I structure things for me, it may help, I hope it does.

For those that haven't checked the chat room out, come along and say hi, there's a wealth of experience in there, and is second only (personal opinion) to a live GA attended meeting. They continue to be my rocks.

Anyway, best wishes to all, stay strong and take one day at a time in committing to a gamble free day.
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Messages In This Thread
The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 09-01-2018, 08:30 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 13-01-2018, 09:46 AM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 17-01-2018, 04:43 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 23-01-2018, 09:17 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by Simmo - 24-01-2018, 11:18 AM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 01-02-2018, 09:44 AM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 13-02-2018, 05:29 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by Simmo - 13-02-2018, 05:47 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 20-02-2018, 10:51 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 28-02-2018, 12:07 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by Simmo - 28-02-2018, 12:28 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 06-03-2018, 10:41 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 12-03-2018, 11:19 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 20-03-2018, 10:48 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 27-03-2018, 06:36 AM
RE: The Journey Begins - by smartie - 28-03-2018, 06:51 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 29-03-2018, 10:21 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 06-04-2018, 02:27 AM
RE: The Journey Begins - by Simmo - 06-04-2018, 03:21 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 19-04-2018, 06:48 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 01-05-2018, 07:58 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by Simmo - 01-05-2018, 09:08 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 09-05-2018, 12:49 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by Simmo - 09-05-2018, 01:49 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 09-05-2018, 04:09 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 30-05-2018, 09:46 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by Simmo - 31-05-2018, 11:03 AM
RE: The Journey Begins - by Simmo - 03-07-2018, 11:48 AM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 07-07-2018, 01:40 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by Simmo - 09-07-2018, 08:41 AM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 19-07-2018, 09:49 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 01-08-2018, 09:22 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by Simmo - 01-08-2018, 09:39 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 02-09-2018, 08:25 AM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 18-09-2018, 07:43 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by Chris_b - 18-09-2018, 10:39 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 11-10-2018, 10:17 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by Chris_b - 12-10-2018, 09:15 AM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 30-12-2018, 09:48 AM
RE: The Journey Begins - by shoebox - 07-01-2019, 12:30 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 20-06-2019, 06:37 AM
RE: The Journey Begins - by StrengthToStop - 20-05-2020, 02:45 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by shoebox - 21-05-2020, 08:06 PM
RE: The Journey Begins - by gadaveuk - 04-07-2020, 05:48 AM

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