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My story
Hello there I'm a new member on this forum.My name is Andrei I'm 30 years old and I m a compulsive gambler.Gambling has been a part of my life since I wasnt even the legal age of doing it.I remember I started playing the slots machine and placing sports bets when I was not even 16.The problem with that is when I think now objectively I wasted half of my life on nothing,on a mirrage.

I remember 12 years ago i started playing online poker and in 2010-2011 I made some 20-30k good money for a youngster who never worked a day in his life and I was thinking I'm gonna be this young poker superstar and I will never have to take a booring 9 to 5 job like 95% of the people.But it was all a dream it never came true.My life was a constant rollercoaster,win something it loose it back,win again then loose it again back.And in the meantime creating debts and problems neglecting family and friends,not going out enough,not seeking for a relationship maybe a girlfriend,wife,kids etc.In my entire adult life from 18-30 I never had a serious relationship because I rarely looked for one to be honest.I only focused on gambling and used prostitutes lol.

I signed up on this forum because I want a change maybe its not too late to move my focus on other things.Everyone that I meet tells me that I'm extremely funny and I was thinking maybe I can do a career as a comedian or acting in tv or movies,I can take acting classes or something,at least give it a try because for a long time I have a passion for comedy.And I feel like I have the talent to do something else with my life and all that potential is wasted on gambling.Its sad when you think about it.

I tried many times to stop,to ban myself from websites or to impose limits but with no success I always find ways to come back.When I have extra money in my account the first impulse,the first thought is to gamble and the most dificult days to stay away are the weekends when I'm at home.Its so easy to gamble these days you are just one click away and this makes it 1000 times harder to stop.I asked myself many times if I loose and the outcome is the same all the time ''Why am I still doing this?'' and the answer is I dont think its about the money its more about the thrill,that adrenaline that pumps into the blood lol.I m addicted to that feeling it makes me feel alive but it also clouds judgement and its extremely nocive and at the end when i loose the money i feel depressed.I believe even If I win lets say 5 mil $,in 2-3 years I ll probably spew them away and return from where I was so all this thing its just time consuming. 

Anyway I'm glad I found this forum and if you have any advice on what mindset I should adopt to stop gambling it would be much appreciated.Have a good day everyone and stay safe!Smile

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