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beaten again
Hi Andy

I know as well as you do, how hard it is to deny the urge to gamble.
I have been gamble free for 16 months now.
My worst urge was when I had to buy a new pair of shoes (I had fallen out of a tree and smashed my heel bone, and now my feet aren't exactly normal looking). At that stage I had been clean for about 5 months. Trouble was I didn't have the money to buy shoes!

The only thing that stopped me from going to a venue was me remembering the very worst thing I ever did as a gambler, and how it still hurts me to think I could do that.

I stole money from my sister. Why? If I had stolen money from a stranger or a bank, I am sure it would not have had the same effect on me. This was my low "rock bottom".
That was the reason I decided to commit suicide.

How much did I hate myself? Loathe myself?

Andy, I know where you are at with your thinking. ( or I think I do <!-- sSmile --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_smile.gif" alt="Smile" title="Smile" /><!-- sSmile --> )

Three days off the punt is a great start. If you do have the urge, think about how you felt at your lowest point. <!-- sSad --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_sad.gif" alt="Sad" title="Sad" /><!-- sSad --> Do you want to go back there? I know I don't. Life is not great for me, but I can certainly say that it is improving, and will keep on improving.

This is where your GA meetings can help you. There will be members at your meeting who are obviously happy with their lot. Think about this....I can almost guarantee you that they will be in a huge amount of debt, so why would they be happy? Hope! The chance to have a better life!
The realisation that money does not make your life a happy one.It never has and never will.
You have to be content with what you have to be happy!

I am content. I choose not to gamble. Every day is a better day. Tomorrow the sun will rise, the birds will sing, I will be greeted by my German Shepherd dog.
What more could I want? <!-- sBig Grin --><img src="{SMILIES_PATH}/icon_e_biggrin.gif" alt="Big Grin" title="Very Happy" /><!-- sBig Grin -->

Hang in there Andy

Best wishes

Messages In This Thread
beaten again - by andy compulsive gambler - 21-05-2010, 02:59 AM
Re: beaten again - by metroplex - 22-05-2010, 09:19 AM
Re: beaten again - by Guest - 22-05-2010, 11:42 AM
Re: beaten again - by carlonvi - 22-05-2010, 03:36 PM
Re: beaten again - by Guest - 22-05-2010, 09:02 PM
Re: beaten again - by andy again - 22-05-2010, 09:56 PM
Re: beaten again - by Guest - 23-05-2010, 11:35 PM
Re: beaten again - by Guest - 24-05-2010, 11:32 AM
Re: beaten again - by andy again - 25-05-2010, 09:07 PM
Re: beaten again - by andy again - 25-05-2010, 09:17 PM
Re: beaten again - by Guest - 26-05-2010, 01:05 PM
Re: beaten again - by andy again - 26-05-2010, 09:10 PM
Re: beaten again - by Guest - 27-05-2010, 12:29 PM

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