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I have been struggling with gambling most of my life realy and i have tryed many times to stop but i always seem to fail with it i first decided i needed to stop gambling on the 20th of september 2010 and i managed to stop untill the 4th of november then i had a slip on the way to my meeting at chester i remember the journey home after i had been gambling for the first time in in like 6 weeks i felt sick to my stomach and i had to go home and tell every one what i had done there was a lot of shouting and hard feelings that night but after that day i managed to stop for over 4 months with out going back to gambling was the best 4 months of my life i would have to say for the longest time in my life i felt a normal person then in febuary we had to sell the house because of all the gambling debt and move in to rented and thats when i slipped back in to the same old pattern of gambling i just thought i have lost so much what more can i lose but i still had a lot to live for my family my dogs the mrs but i put gambling befor them all again and found my self gambling into the money that we had left from the sale of the house our last bit of money our last chance to buy a new smaller house eventually u can not gamble that money we have left that is for our future and when that is gone then iam totally wrecked and never stand any chance of having my own house again .

so on saturday after a day of gambling my brains out i decided i needed help i did not want to admit i was beat again i thought i could some how controll my gambling but iam a compulsive gambler and i can never controll it !!! so last night i sat on my bed after losing a lot of money and feeling totally crazy and thought i have to find a way out of this hell b4 its too late !

i got up this morning and all i could think about was gambling and ways to lie so i could get my access to money back that i had handed controll to my mrs i have been climbing the walls all day i feel totally crazy and still iam sitting here thinking of gambling and if only i could just win some money iam kidding my self as no amount of money will be enough for me ... why am i wanting to get money to gamble as i write this it is so sad that iam like a drug addict trying to get my fix ....

i just can not do this any more i need to live i need to feel happy and havea clear head gambling is turning me in to a horrible person and will destroy every thing that i love and push away wvery one who loves me

so if i can just get through today with no gambling then i think tomorrow will get better and so on its just i need to break this cycle that i have found my self in for the last few weeks that i have been gamble like a mad man

i just want gambling thoughs to go away its so hard to fight them
hi my name is mark and like you i have gambled away a hell of alot. Also like you i feel the shame for being this way.if you read my post [ how sick i am i}.you will see how bad i you i have handed control of the family money to my partner.also like you i cant think about any thing accept gambleing and trying to find ways to get my hands on some money this is the third day i have not gambled.i just have to keep telling my self its not worth it looseing my family.
then you think well what if i win i can get it all back.just two weeks ago i had a massive win it was in the thouasands i lost it all back and a hell of a lot more with it just could not the moral is you cant win.but sometimes i too think what the hell go for it. but in your hart off harts even if you won do you really think you would stop.I know i cant. if you have a little cash left its better then having nothing.and i think we both know thats going to happen if we dont stop. I have read a lot off gamblers stories.and one story really sticks in my head. the guys post stated how sad and lonely he was and how he missed his wife and kids.he was living in a bedsit on his own. broke and broken the post was made on christmas day.its just not worth it ,i wish you all the best and hope you stop.
We are friends....that means ANY THOUGHT that you need a bet just send me a message first, i will not judge. I dont want to know after the event.

Your lucky at this moment that you still have the MRS....mine left, my business eventually went as no one could trust me....I was alone, with nothing but the body I had destroyed.

What is lost can be replaced...eventually...step by step....the thoughts will go away, they will subside....

I remember like it was yesterday climbing the walls for desperation for a bet....

what happens when its all gone...the family...the GF...the cash...then is when you find strength to change, strength to say no...

Mike you saved me when I had a slip and we are very similar but you MUST stop wallowing, whats gone is aint coming back....there is only one thing Mikey needs to do and that is wake up in the morning and say that was me and today its not going to be me...

I have no need to tell you my story just to say i know I am right as do you Mike, in four years I have acheived more than in all my "gambling days" with one slip to mention its not bad.

Best wishes friend...text when you need.

Snap,i too know no matter what i won i wouldnt u marko i won a huge amount-well into the thousands but a week later spent it all and left trying to sort out the mess.had managed to go 20 days but then let myself down by playing the freeplay slots.could be worse,couldve been real money but thankfully have no credit on my is a terrible addiction that can never be cured its always going to be there lurking in the background.all i can say is keep strong and try to find some positivity.time is a great healer,taking every day as it comes and not thinking of tomorrow.were never going to win our money back its long gone and its wishful thinking to think we could but would you honestly use the money wisely or like me would it all go with more as well!!!dont lose anything else to dirty gambling,money,property,family or can come back from this,you just need to want times i feel like im losing my sanity but i will get there,i really hope you do too.x

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