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Day 1.No bet 30th May 2013
Hi Andy

I am not sure if you are the same Andy who used to post on here a few years back, you write very similarly anyway. However, it doesn't have to be a white-knuckle ride!

You wrote:

"Its always going to be on a knife edge,I cant be bothered to go to meetings even though they work,Im bored of going through exactly the same process every time."

The meetings do work, and I am sure you know that by ignoring them and trying to do it on your own, this way is destined to fail miserably. trust me when I say that however you feel right now you can feel a lot worse. This is a progressive illness. i don't mean the gambling itself, I mean the consequences of gambling.

The only thing that has worked for you is meetings! There is no reason why they cannot work again. It was spoken about in my meeting last night, how and why people break out often long periods of gambling. On page 6 of the orange book it mentions that 'the GA program will always work for anyone who wants to stop gambling'. If you have broken out then the chances are you were not working the program. Something I ask myself regularly is, am I doing enough. After all it is a self-help program. On page 10 of that book it mentions about a change from within is necessary and that it requires diligent effort. I often ask myself 'Am I putting in enough effort?' Quite often the resulting answer is no. And, it often is for others too.

Please go back to your meetings Andy. Don't be yet another addict defeated by this illness. You must find the strength from somewhere to face this problem, but don't try to do it on your own.

It doesn't have to be a white-knuckle ride!

Big Dave (Eastcote/Uxbridge)
Maybe just write in one post Andy and add to it next time rather than start a new thread each time?
It makes it easier to follow your experience and hopefully show your progress

Smartie xx
I thought it was you Andy.

I know it is a pain when you have to weigh up whether to put petrol in the car or food on the table, but surely there was someone at the meeting you went to who could give you a lift. All meetings that I have been to there are many who car share. Or maybe you were too proud to ask, I don't know.

Anyway, there is no excuse for not attending meetings, after all, there is an online meeting in the chat room here every Thursday evening at 9pm. It is not quite the same as being at a physical meeting, but it is better than nothing.

Another option for helping to stay off is staying in contact (over the phone) to other GA members. Or, possibly even meeting up for a coffee. It only takes two people to have a meeting, and it doesn't have to be done in the conventional way to be beneficial. These 'mini' meetings have been some of the best I have had. A long chat on the phone with an individual, in the car park after a meeting, etc... They all help. Talking in general about this illness helps.

Don't lose hope Andy. However, it is up to you though to put your hand out for help.

Big Dave (Eastcote/Uxbridge)
Its a great reminder to me Andy that there is a big difference between abstinence and recovery.
Like yourself I attended meetings for a while..and life sort of improved...

It was when I started working the recovery programme 24-7 that life started to show shoots of growth.

Before recovery I measured my success by days away from gambling which was great, but when I next had a bet, I felt it was all for nothing.

The difference now is I'm living in the day and trying to make the most of it.
I won't say its easy Andy...It isn't...but its a darn sight better than the alternative.

Ultimately GA can only help me if I accept the help. GA has never helped me when I've turned up with a closed mind.

Really wish you the best Andy..
Hope you make the right choice for you..
Smartie xx

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