27-04-2010, 01:27 PM
Hi Di
Good idea not to push him. You will only push him further toward gambling as ameans of "escape into his dreamworld".
FYI, I have only been attending GA for 15 months, but in that time I have heard of ONLY one case where someone has been able to remain gamble free (at this stage) by going it alone. Sobering thought!!!
One of the hardest thing for a gambler to do is let go of the money that he/she has already lost. We are always chasing that elusive "big win" which will solve all our problems...(financial problems anyway). We have to come to terms with the fact that the money we have lost is lost forever, and the only way forward is to NOT gamble. This is one of the many reasons why your husband is so depressed. He probably hates what he is doing, loathes himself, has no urge to do anything.
This is all too common with us.
Depression is extremely common with a CG, as with all addictions. We don't get high on drugs or alcohol, we get our high from gambling... the thrill of winning or losing. After the gambling urge has passed, and we are skint, that is when depression really kicks in. About a third of my GA group are on medication to treat our depression.
Re your accounts. The easiest fix is for you to change all your accounts. You can keep your same bank if you like, but just request a new account. When you do this, enquire about what you have to do to ensure that you, and you alone are able to withdraw money from that account. You might have to sign a form stipulating that your signature only has to be on the withdrawal form .
All the best from Brisbane
Roy
Good idea not to push him. You will only push him further toward gambling as ameans of "escape into his dreamworld".
FYI, I have only been attending GA for 15 months, but in that time I have heard of ONLY one case where someone has been able to remain gamble free (at this stage) by going it alone. Sobering thought!!!
One of the hardest thing for a gambler to do is let go of the money that he/she has already lost. We are always chasing that elusive "big win" which will solve all our problems...(financial problems anyway). We have to come to terms with the fact that the money we have lost is lost forever, and the only way forward is to NOT gamble. This is one of the many reasons why your husband is so depressed. He probably hates what he is doing, loathes himself, has no urge to do anything.
This is all too common with us.
Depression is extremely common with a CG, as with all addictions. We don't get high on drugs or alcohol, we get our high from gambling... the thrill of winning or losing. After the gambling urge has passed, and we are skint, that is when depression really kicks in. About a third of my GA group are on medication to treat our depression.
Re your accounts. The easiest fix is for you to change all your accounts. You can keep your same bank if you like, but just request a new account. When you do this, enquire about what you have to do to ensure that you, and you alone are able to withdraw money from that account. You might have to sign a form stipulating that your signature only has to be on the withdrawal form .
All the best from Brisbane
Roy