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gambling depression
Thanks Roy,Dave,Adam,Ginger for all your support and kind words.I do take every bit of advice in to my head,but when I get in gambling mode,it all goes out the window and my brain just has a destruction mode and wont even pause to take a thought.It does make me sick every day,thinking about the recent lossses,really sick cos I had to work so hard,and will have to work harder to pay back the debts and its not fair.Apart from that its also hard enough to keep my head above water with all the bills etc,and the stress is unrelenting.I have sorted finances out until end of the month,but it never gets easier though.Its only 17 days without a bet now,but the destruction the last binge left is now all coming to the surface with the credit card bills and massive losses I suffered 3 weeks ago.I will be at meeting tommorrow evening again,and I will try to make sure I keep them up this time,because if I dont,Im certain that at some point I will end up gambling again.I hate gambling,I hate bookies,and if only I could turn the clock back to not gamble and suffer all this pain,despair and misery and have my better years back.

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